I studied her face. She took a deep breath and seemed to grow smaller, more vulnerable. A single tear fell from her eye. She wiped at it angrily, as if it were an ugly blemish she wanted no one else to see.

“He loved me,” she said. “I know he did. But his duty to protect the relic was more important to him. So I left him to his duty. I knew he’d die because of it one day, but I wanted to live my life. He was so angry when I left. That surprised me—how furious he was with me. He was so willing to hate me, but so hesitant to love me.”

Tucking her hair behind her ears and folding her arms across her chest, she looked at me finally, offering me a kind, hopeful smile. She looked so human in that moment. “At least he put up a hell of a fight, huh?”

I smiled weakly back. “Yeah.”

“I just want to know why no one else heard,” she said, and suddenly she was all business again. She straightened herself and looked to Will. “What do you think?”

He shrugged. “Think about Nathaniel’s aspect. If the attacking reaper was strong enough, he could wipe the minds of any humans close enough to have overheard. Either they never noticed or they remember nothing of the incident. Human minds are easily tampered with. Nathaniel would have had no trouble covering this up.”

“Right,” Ava grumbled bitterly. “Well, Bastian has quite the assortment of thugs. I’m sure he’s got a vir for every occasion.”

The idea of Nathaniel, or another vir, being capable of manipulating the human mind disturbed me. It seemed like the ultimate violation of a person. The mind was supposed to be a safe, sacred place, and for it to be torn open and completely vulnerable was a terrifying idea. I had no clue how to protect myself against such an attack and prayed that I’d never have to.

Suddenly, I couldn’t bear to be in the parking lot, so close to that place of death. “I’ve got to go back to school,” I said briskly. “I can only get away with playing hooky for so long.”

“All right,” Will said. “But let’s go back to Nathaniel’s and eat first. You should have a rest before going back.”

That sounded like a wonderful idea. As soon as the thought of food entered my mind, my stomach clenched and growled. I blushed when I saw Will grin.

He gestured toward my car. “Let’s get out of here.”

We rode back to Nathaniel’s house. Ava took off, and Will made lunch for the two of us. When I glanced at my cell, I saw a text from Kate but didn’t answer it. Instead I checked the time.

“I’ve got to run,” I said, stuffing the phone into my back pocket and taking my dishes to the sink to scrub them clean and stick them in the dishwasher.

Will watched me silently from his seat at the table before he rose to follow me out into the living room toward the front door. He caught up to me and pulled lightly on my fingertips, slowing me to a stop. I turned to him and smiled, studying his gaze when he didn’t say anything.

“What’s up?” I asked, allowing him to pull more of my hand into his own and rub my palm with his thumb. He sucked in his upper lip, and I knew then that he was nervous. My smile faded.

“I have to tell you something,” he said. “Because it’s not right that I keep this from you any longer. I don’t want to keep anything from you.”

“Okay …”

“Do you remember when we said no more secrets?” he asked as he stared at the ground, his voice faint and small.

I swallowed hard and something tightened in my chest. “Yeah.” The word was almost nothing.

“It’s been eating away at me,” he said. “Devouring me from the inside out.”

I shook my head, studying his dull green eyes in confusion. “What are you talking about?”

“I thought everything was over.” His voice was cracking, and he took a long, deep breath to steady it, but the effort was useless. “I believed that I’d failed for the last time, that you were gone forever, because of what I’d failed to do for you.”

Fear tightened around my throat as I tried to figure out what he was trying to tell me.

“I loved you,” he continued, looking up to meet my gaze at last. “And I was broken for so long. For forty years, I waited and waited and searched for you. I hadn’t seen Nathaniel in over a decade, and I was so alone. Marcus and Ava came around a few times, and after being alone for so long, I stopped thinking or feeling. I hated myself for losing you.”

I felt an urge to reach for him, but I was afraid to. “I don’t understand. What are you trying to tell me?”

“Ava and I grew close,” he said, looking away from me. “We …”

“So it’s true, then. You slept with Ava?”

“Yes.” The word was barely audible, barely anything more than a small exhale of air through those lips I’d kissed and loved.

“I don’t even know what to say.” I swallowed hard.

“You don’t have to say anything, Ellie.”

My fingers were numb. I tightened them into balls and stretched them back out to regain sensation, but as I did, the rest of my body began to lose feeling everywhere. “So she’s not demonic or a spy or anything. The only reason she hates me is because you slept together. All this time, you told me there was nothing between you two, and there was.”

He started to reach for my hands. “She’s only my friend. She is nothing compared to the way I feel about you.”