Wicked Abyss Page 85
Her outrage at her treason trial . . . her bewilderment at losing her cold parents . . . the horror of their beheading . . . her resentment over her exile . . .
Saetth had to have weakened her attachment—just as she’d said earlier. Enraged at the idea of her kissing that fey, Sian had hardly listened to her.
As if a band had tightened around his chest, Sian’s breaths shallowed. He’d made a pledge to her—an understanding represented by the diamond—to forgive the past and move forward.
But he hadn’t.
He murmured, “I broke my pledge.”
Dimly, he heard Rune tell Allixta, “I shouldn’t have concealed my knowledge of Sian’s mate. Maybe nothing good will ever come from that line.”
“Bravery did.” Three heads swung around in Sian’s direction. “A powerless fey, not yet immortal, marched into my hold to take down a Møriør. She braved the lion’s den—in hell. Even though she knew Rune could appear at any time to assassinate her.”
Allixta said, “Did she brave such risks out of love for the male she’d always wanted?”
Reluctantly agreeing with the witch, Rune said, “Love can make beings do crazy things.”
Sian nodded. “That’s true. In fact, I am going to do something I would’ve thought impossible just weeks ago. I am going to have faith in my mate.” Saying those words bolstered his resolve. Calliope couldn’t have feigned that wonder in the diamond cave. She and Sian had begun something. “My female told me she loves me. I’m going to believe her.”
“According to your memories, she said that after you locked her in a dungeon,” Allixta pointed out. “What wouldn’t she have said to get free? Didn’t she lie to you repeatedly?”
Sian stood. “She had no choice. But I do.”
“For gods’ sakes, demon, your female admitted that she sought to destroy you.”
“Until she learned to trust me.”
Allixta’s lips thinned. “Your decision affects more than just you. If she speaks Demonish, she could have read your correspondence, or overheard you talking.”
Rune added, “We have no idea how close she is with Nïx.”
“Then my mate and I will both have an alliance that our partner hates.” If I haven’t lost her.
Allixta made a scoffing laugh. “Now you’re just being silly. Why would she prefer a hell-changed demon over the gorgeous, golden king of her own kind? One she’s loved since her earliest memories?”
“Brother, if Saetth is what she desires . . .” Rune trailed off, searching for the right words. “You can’t force her to want you.”
Sian heard his allies’ thoughts.
Allixta: —Delusional demon.—
Rune: —Desperate male.—
Darach: —Unstable. Like me.—
“Damn it, I’m not seeing this situation wrongly! Am I desperate not to be mateless? Of course. But if I’d kept my mind from the past, I wouldn’t have reacted like this.” He stabbed his fingers into his hair. “She knew I would think the worst. She predicted my behavior like a bloody soothsayer. Yet she’d still broached talking to me last night.”
Her words: I need your help, your advice. I want to figure this out, but I can’t do it alone.
She must have dreaded his reaction to her bloodline. How could she not have after the things he’d said about it?
Now that he could think clearly, he realized Calliope had been longing to tell him everything—despite his idiocy.
That was the reason for her distance. That was the conundrum.
How to fix his colossal mistake? He would return hat in hand. He’d admit how stupid he’d been. Once more he would plead to her. . . .
Rune said, “But won’t you always react like this? Your mate’s betrayal will continue to influence your view. This will just happen again.”
Darach nodded. —Stuck in rut.—
“No. Because I forgive her for the past.” Sian rasped, “I forgive her down to her very soul. From now until I die, I’m going to believe in her.” But could she forgive him?
Allixta sighed. “You can’t argue with the deluded. . . .” She trailed off, her eyes widening.
“What?”
“Well, look at you, Mr. Man.”
Sian frowned, turning to Rune and Darach. Both were slack-jawed.
“What is it?” he demanded. Was that . . . ash wisping in front of him?
Rune’s shock gave way to a grin. “You might want to take a gander at your reflection.”
Sian raised his hands to touch his face, freezing at the sight of them. They were transforming into . . . into his former hands. A thin line of fire bordered each of his lengthy claws, scorching them away.
He teleported in front of an undamaged part of the glass. Gaped at his reflection.
His face had morphed back into his previous guise, his piercings gone. His glyphs faded, his skin growing smooth and tanned. That simmering heat singed away his wings. Would those proud horns remain?
They too burned to nothing. . . .
Rune traced behind him. “Your curse is being reversed.”
How? Why? As Sian’s thoughts raced, his dam’s words flickered through his mind: Find the fire, and your appearance will be pleasing.
He’d taken her words literally, scouring his realm for the hellfire.
Though his reflection tried to hold his attention, Sian peered past it, gazing out into the black ether. Was this what his ancestor had seen?
Suddenly Sian understood the moral of the hellfire tale passed down in his family. If the universe hadn’t been dark, his ancestor would never have spied that fire in the distance.
It took darkness to see the light.
For Sian, Calliope was the fire on the horizon. He’d dreamed of her, obsessing over her, searching for her in every era.
He hadn’t been sleepwalking—he’d been immersed in darkness. He’d vowed to survive long enough for her to return to him. Which meant the promise of reuniting with her had gotten him through all those years, leading him forward.
Calliope had become his beacon, a point of reference from which to view all other things. If he kept his eyes on her . . .
I’ll always know my way.
But he hadn’t. He’d taken his eyes off her to look to the past.
Never again. His search had prepared him. By forgiving her, he’d found her. His heart soared. . . .