Undead and Uneasy Chapter 40


"Here comes the bride," I hummed, slipping into my shoes. "All dressed in white. (And red.) Here comes the bride, back from the dead. (Again.)"

"That song blows." Jessica leaned over my shoulder to freshen her lipstick with my mirror. "And don't get me started on your singing voice."

"Cured your cancer and all I get is grief."

"Hey, I didn't make you cure me. By the way, is it just me or is everyone still freaked out about what you did the other night?"

"Yeah, well. I'm not exactly sure what it is I did."

"Neither are Sinclair or Tina. That's why it's driving them nuts."

"Not to mention Michael and the others," Antonia piped up, coming into the dressing room without knocking, as was her habit. "They're gonna walk soft around you for a while. Heh. Oh, and bimbo? Next time you've got two dead guys in coffins and me in a cage, lively and ready to kick ass, let me out first! I could have helped you with that rotten monkey Marjorie."

"I'll keep it in mind."

"Least now I know what the fuss is all about," she muttered, waving away Jessica's offer of a mascara wand. "Running around as a wolf is fun ." She fussed with her lapels and managed only to hopelessly rumple her ruby jacket. "But you know? I haven't had a vision since the one indicating Sinclair shouldn't go to Marjorie's alone. I wonder if I can still see the future."

"Well," I said, feeling uncomfortable, "if you can't, and you miss it, I'm sorry. I didn't-"

"Can it, Betsy. I'm not bitching. Just wondering." "Will you hold still?" Jessica demanded. Her suit, a twin to Antonia's, was sapphire blue. "You're all rumpled."

"And you're all annoying, but I'm putting up with that shit, aren't I? I'm here in the middle of monkey rituals, aren't I?"

"Shut up," I said warmly.

Tina rapped on the door, then poked her head inside. "It's almost time, Majesty. My! You're breathtaking."

"It's true," I said modestly. Tina was in the same Vera Wang suit as Jessica and Antonia, except hers was buttercup yellow. With Tina's teeny frame and big dark eyes, and cascades of blond hair, it worked.

Everything worked. It was my day, and everything worked.

I sighed happily and applied more blush. "Hey, did Sinclair talk to you about the new job?"

"What new job?" Jessica asked.

"We need a new librarian," I told my reflection, and grinned. "The last one came down with a slight case of death."

"I have many responsibilities here in the mansion," Tina said. "I will have to consider this very carefully."

"Crissake, when don't you consider everything very carefully?" Antonia yawned and-I wasn't sure how she did this without moving-rumpled her suit jacket again.

"But the chance to get my hands on all those tomes. . ." Tina was practically drooling. "The opportunity for pure research alone makes it a tempting prize."

"Yeah, yeah.Tempting. Betsy, lighten up with the Peach Parfait or you'll be all slutted out."

"Here, let me." Jessica snatched the blusher from my hands and grabbed a tissue with the other hand. She rubbed my cheeks, and for an awful moment I thought she was going to spit on the Kleenex.

"Hmm," Tina said. That was all, just, "Hmm."

"How can you screw up blush?" Jessica was bitching. "You make it look like you're blushing. Then you stop.

"Hmm."

"Will all of you bitches just leave me alone?" I cried.

"The warning cry of the Raptor Bridal Bird," Antonia snickered.

"Look how snotty you got since you found out you are able to turn into a wolf."

"And when your boyfriend remembered how to read.Oh, and that he has a master's in math."

"That's it!" Tina cried, startling all of us into shutting up. "You never feed, Majesty, compared to us you never feed. So you're always hungry. Always. You think that's how it's supposed to be. For you, hunger is as much a state of the mind as it is of the body. So when Marjorie was killing you, your instinct wasn't to reach with your teeth. It was to reach with your mind! "

She was on her feet, screeching that last.

Antonia stared. I stared. Jessica corrected my blush.

"Um. Excuse me," she muttered, smoothing her skirt.

My mom poked her head in the room. "Are you ready?"

"Yeah," Antonia replied.

"I think she was talking to me," I said.

"Oh, yeah, like it's all about you."

"Today it is. Let's do it!"

"You may kiss the bride," Judge Summit informed us, and Sinclair was too glad to comply. He'd done a remarkable job of concealing his boredom during the brief ceremony, though his dark eyes had gleamed at the sight of me in my gown.

The guests (all the usual suspects, plus the Wyndhams) clapped politely and, as we went back down the aisle, tossed little paper hearts instead of rice.

"They're throwing paper hearts? At vampires?" Sinclair bitched.

"Oh, hush up and try to enjoy the moment."

"But why didn't you tell me you thought there'd be a problem with Sinclair going to see Marjorie?" I asked while the others devoured the chocolate cake (with raspberry filling!) and I tried not to drool. Too bad solid food made me barf.

"She dealt with the problem directly," Michael explained. "She teamed up with the alpha male and tried to support him. Going to you would have been. . ."

"Useless?" I offered.

"Unnecessary," Antonia corrected me, but her cheeks were red. She had underestimated how much I could help, and who could blame her? I wouldn't have thought I could do much, either.

At least not until today.

"Culture clash," Derik said cheerfully, wolfing down his second slice of cake. "Antonia has spent too much time with you vampires. A true werewolf would have sought to put together the largest pack possible."

"Yeah, well, a true werewolf can kiss my ass," Antonia offered.

"You are a true werewolf," Michael pointed out. "You always have been."

"Come on, pack leader. Don't deny there'll be some at home who will finally decide I'm actually worthy of the secret handshake."

Michael said nothing, but Derik broke the tension by showering Antonia in cake crumbs.

"Anyway," Tina put in, batting a few wayward crumbs out of her hair, "everything worked out fine that day, thanks to Her Majesty. Now people will know better than to ask you, Eric, when they need help." She delivered this last line with a nasty, but still friendly, smile.

"I will pretend my feelings aren't lacerated," Sinclair said dryly. His hand was resting on my shoulder. In fact, since I'd rescued him, he was always touching me somewhere or other. Not that I minded in the slightest. I was also loving the fact that we were spending most of our evenings trying to hurt each other during lovemaking.

I glanced down at my new rings. Traditional wedding band and engagement ring. Platinum bands (Sinclair had the twin), one carat diamond setting. Not used. Not cursed.

And Sinclair had taken the news that he was Babyjon's new daddy with remarkable calm. I suspected he still felt tremendous guilt over giving me the cursed ring in the first place. So it was only fair that he would help me raise this kid for the next seventeen or eighteen years.

"So where are you guys off to?" Laura asked. We'd made up just before the wedding, and she had apologized. I'd told her that dear old Mom had dropped by from Hell, and she'd been horrified. She'd suited up in her Vera Wang (emerald green, the color of her eyes when she was eeeeevil). We were fine again. For now.

"New York City," Sinclair replied. The one aspect of the wedding he'd actually taken an interest in was planning the honeymoon. "And I thank you for taking the baby while we're gone."

"Oh, it's my pleasure," Laura gushed.

"We're leaving him behind?" I cried. "But he'll miss us! Me."

"Sorry, my wife. On that I draw the line. Babies and honeymoons do not mix."

"Fascist," I muttered, but I didn't put any real heat into it. In three days I'd gone from lonely and frightened to surrounded by friends, family, and new allies. And Jessica was all better! "You wait until later."

"I dream of later," he murmured back.

I laughed and squeezed his hand. Poor guy, he was holding up pretty well under all the nuttiness. Werewolves, a queen with mondo weird new powers, his privacy shattered by hordes, all who wanted to talk to me. Don't even get me started on Babyjon. So I knew he was looking forward to ditching the group as much as I was, but he didn't know what I'd gotten him for a wedding gift.

Spray-on gourmet flavors. I had bought him Turkey, Gravy, Raspberry, Hash Browns, and Baked Alaska.

I could hardly wait to squirt them all over him. And I'd never been to the Big Apple. I planned to take a great big bite.

"-my own."

"What?"

"I said, come along for a moment, my own. I have something to show you. . . upstairs."

I glanced at our guests. They had broken off into small groups and were chatting about this and that.

"Race you," I whispered, and chased him all the way to our bedroom.

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