“I’m going to ignore that comment about being an ass**le and try to not to feel like a creepy old man for having a wife who is sixteen years my junior and instead get back to the topic at hand.” Gabe raised an eyebrow at Tracy, who smirked. “Do you think that Ben may have been threatened by your becoming mated? Thinking that perhaps you’d challenge him at last?”

“He and I haven’t had any problems lately getting along. We never have. In my entire life the only time I’ve ever been mad at him has been over stupid shit. Nothing major. The man who shoved you tonight is a stranger to me.” And that’s what ate at him most.

“Okay, so I know how he acted to my face yesterday but what was his reaction privately?”

“He was…hesitant. I told him briefly on the phone that I’d met my mate but I didn’t tell him who. I thought he’d get a kick out of it, you know, some kind of political alliance between Cascadia and Pacific.

But when I introduced you that changed. He took me aside and asked me if I was sure you were truly my mate. He seemed agitated. But he was fine to your face. I thought he may have been worried that your Pack was so much stronger and would be in our business a lot.”

Tracy laughed. “Well, if Nina wasn’t there to restrain Lex and Cade, I don’t have any doubt that they’d be up your nose a lot to keep an eye on me—that’s how they are. But that’s a big brother thing. Cade worries like an old woman and Lex is an insufferable meddler. But Nina keeps them both under her thumb so get that horrified look off your face.”

Nick checked his horror. “I don’t know, but I want to get to the bottom of this. There’s no way I’d have you in a place I felt you were unsafe.” Nick pushed a curl back behind her ear.

“Or me. And I don’t think it’s safe and I think your brother is hiding something a hell of a lot bigger than worry that you’d challenge him. I’m not sure what it is and I don’t know him like you do so I could be wrong. But a huge part of my job is based on intuition and I spend all day long reading people. I’d like to talk to him and Sarah more to see what we can see.” Gabe looked up at Nick over Tracy’s head. “And well, the trimate bond thing is going to be tricky enough, my place in the Pack will be problematic.”

Nick nodded. “I realize it feels that way and yes, it probably is that way. You rank higher than me so it would be silly of you to give up that to come be Second in Pacific. As our mate, you will be Second as well as you own position in National. I’m sure we can work out an advisory role for you. A mediator on the Enforcer’s rank would be really beneficial to us. It’ll help me to have another powerful wolf on my side in the inner circle too. Especially in this current situation with Ben and Sarah.”

“Okay. I can deal with that.” Gabe continued to gently stroke his hands over Tracy’s calves.

“Well, and getting back to the current problem—I love you with all my heart, Nick, but I won’t be a member of Pacific in this current state. I can join National at Gabe’s rank or go back to Cascadia and we can work out the commute. I won’t live in that situation and I sure as hell won’t hold a pledge to obey Ben or Sarah.”

Nick closed his eyes. “I’m sorry for putting you through this. Damn him! I can’t lose you, Tracy. I’d go insane if you joined National or went back to Cascadia.”

“No matter what happens with that, you won’t lose me, Nick. I’m yours, regardless of my Pack affiliation. You could join Cascadia but,” she shrugged, “Lex.”

“I know. He’stheEnforcer. Don’t think I haven’t obsessed over that a bit. God this is f**ked up. I won’t allow Ben to hold this Pack if he’s going insane or going to break it in half. I’ll challenge him before I let you be driven away.”

“We have a bit before any of that needs to go that way.” Gabe tried to stay reasonable.

“And what are you going to do, Gabe? You’ve said you’d take the Second rank in a ceremonial way.

But what do you want to do?” Tracy took his hand and kissed his knuckles.

He touched his chin as he thought. “I’ve been thinking. I’m damned good at what I do. I’ve trained for the last nearly twenty years to do it. There’s no room for me at Pacific. Excuse my bluntness here, but I’m much more powerful than Ben and there is no way I’d be in that Pack without challenging him. Tracy can join National, of course, and we can go bi-coastal. Theoretically, Nick could join National at my rank, but he’s not a mediator. I’m not sure where he’d fit in at National. I see some major problems with that.”

“Can you take some time off while we deal with this? You’re leaving tomorrow?” Panic raced through Tracy at the thought of him leaving.

Sensing her emotions, he pulled her into his lap. “No, honey, I’m not leaving tomorrow. I’ll take some time, I have it to take. There are some things brewing that I need to keep an eye on but my assistant will keep me apprised. Do you think I’d just leave you right now? With all this up in the air?”

“I don’t know. I’m all over the map here. You have a life in Boston. Friends and family and a Pack.

You’re important, your job is important so of course I understand that sometimes I’ll come second to that. I just,” her bottom lip trembled and his heart constricted in his chest, “I don’t want you to go away and forget me. I worry that you’ll go away and I’ll never see you and you’ll feel trapped and…” A sob tore through her and he hugged her tight.