Tri Mates Page 19
“Because you left a bed with me in it to call her.”
He took a step toward her and she moved back and he growled at her. “Don’t. Tracy, my wolf is so close to the surface right now. Please, don’t hold yourself back from me.”
“I don’t want you to touch me.”
He closed his eyes. “This isn’t the way it’s supposed to go.”
“Oh, should I stand there and look vacant like Sarah? Would that be amenable to you?”
“Can we stop this and work things out please? We’re in the same Pack, she’s your Alpha.”
“Not if I don’t join your Pack. Right now my Alpha is Cade Warden and Cascadia is looking better and better by the second.”
He froze. “What? You’re not being rational. I’m sorry I hurt you. I woke up and wanted to share this with someone. I was happy, damn you! I wanted to call someone who is my best friend to share it with her. She’s up early because she does financial analysis and gets up with the markets in New York.”
“And yet, your best friend talked smack about me and you what? Lost your tongue? If anyone spoke ill of you I’d have cut them off at the knees.”
“She’s jealous, damn it! She doesn’t mean it. She likes you and she wants me to be happy. And you make me happy. Or you do sometimes when you’re not insane. Tracy, you’re my mate.”
“Well, I don’t like her. And I don’t like you leaving me to call her. And I don’t like you not defending me. And I don’t like your f**king apartment with its white carpets and furniture that looks like I can’t sit on it and I want my dog and my family and my business! I have nothing here. No friends, no family, nothing, and you don’t seem to get that.”
“This apartment is perfect for me, Tracy. My gym is just a few blocks’ walk and the Pack offices are half a mile away. All my favorite restaurants are close by.”
She looked at him and shook her head. “You’re unbelievable. You. You. You. This apartment is perfect foryou. Your gym is close. Your job is close and let’s not forget your favorite restaurants. Forgive me! Oh and let’s not forget about your best friend. Well, Nick, you can keep your apartment and your best friend and your stupid messed-up Pack. I’m going back to Seattle.”
She turned on her heel and stormed out of the room, Nick on her heels.
He caught up with her, the weight of his body bringing her down to the bed. He remained on top of her, holding her in place. “You’re right! Okay? I’ve been a selfish ass**le. You are giving up everything. We’ll buy a house and your dog can come live with us. Don’t leave me, Tracy. Not when I’ve found you. I love you. I want to be with you. Not Sarah. I swear to you. It was never about that. I called to share this thing with her because she has it too and I just wanted to marvel over it.”
She felt his heart pounding against her chest, heard the sincerity in his voice. But it hurt. Hearing that call hurt and she didn’t know what to do about it.
“Please. Baby, let’s work this out. Forgive me.”
He put his forehead on hers and the tears came from her gut with a gasp.
“Oh, love, god, I’ve made you cry. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. How can I make it better? Tell me.”
“I don’t know. How can I trust you? I can’t. And her , I don’t want to be in a Pack with her. I don’t want to be in the same state with her.”
“You can trust me, Tracy. I haven’t violated your trust from the first moment I touched you. Surely you can feel me through the bond. You must know I’m telling you the truth.”
She didn’t know what to think. She did feel a bit on edge and a bit crazy over it. She wanted to hurt Sarah for saying that stuff about her and for trying to undermine her with Nick.
“Perhaps. But you went to her and you stayed silent when she spoke poorly of me. How can I let that be my Alpha? In comparison, well, there is no comparison. Cade is a hundred times better than that.
Nina, who is the highest-level female, who outranks me,
is not sneaky and cruel. Why would I trade that for your Pack? Why would I trade Cascadia for Pacific?”
“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything. But you don’t know her. She was just blowing off steam. She didn’t mean any of it. If I thought she did, I would have said something. If she ever would have said anything negative about you again, I’d definitely defend you. But this whole thing has been an adjustment for everyone. You aren’t anchored to anyone. I can’t explain it to you but certainly, Cade and Nina must be close.”
“Yes. And I’ve seen the way he looks at her and that’s what worries me.”
“Cade isn’t mated yet. When he finds his mate the intensity of his love and desire for Nina will fade.
That’s what happened to me. Plus, Cade, Lex and Nina live together. I’ve made it a point to live across the city. I’m trying to be honest with you about all of this.”
His eyes were earnest and his voice was sincere. She could hear the pain in it at having hurt her as well as being hurt himself.
“Please don’t leave, Tracy. Stay here with me. Love me and let me love you.”
She took a deep breath. “I do love you. That’s why it hurt so much to hear that phone call.”
“If I could redo some of my actions from the last two days, I would. We’d be in my…our bed right now and I wouldn’t have made that call. But I can’t turn back time. All I can do is ask you to hold on with me through all of this so we can continue to move forward and grow together. Because I want you so much.