Glancing back at my laptop screen, I saw Stu hadn’t replied yet and I couldn’t bring myself to look his way.

God, this was awful.

Unable to take any more I slammed the device shut and tried to focus on the lesson again. I walked around the room, providing help with the assignment to those who needed it. Not once did I approach Stu, too scared of what I might see.

Pity. Rejection.

This could all just be sexual for him. Basic attraction. On an emotional level he might not feel anything for me at all. At lunch I left the classroom before most of the students, hurrying to my car and hiding there for the rest of the hour. My phone practically taunted me, urging me to check my messages and see if he’d responded. I was too much of a coward though, and instead ate my sandwich and read yesterday’s newspaper that I’d left on the back seat.

There was no way I’d emerge from my car until certain there’d be students in my classroom. Sure enough, most of them had returned from lunch, Stu among them. He was chatting with Kian, his back turned to me as I entered. The other students were the buffer I needed. He couldn’t say anything in front of them. At least, I hoped he wouldn’t.

When the day drew to a close I started to concoct an exit strategy. How could I get out of the classroom without colliding with Stu?

In the end I latched on to Mary and Susan, chatting with them about how they planned to spend their evenings as a method of avoidance. I could practically feel Stu’s irritation like a tangible thing, but I continued to ignore him. On the drive home I decided I’d pay my parents a visit and eat dinner at their place. After a quick pit stop at the flat to take a shower and change my clothes, I set out for their place. Alfie was holed up in his room, oblivious to my comings and goings.

“Andrea! What a lovely surprise,” said Mum, answering the door to me. She wore a light floral dress and I could tell she’d recently gotten her hair done.

“I hope you don’t mind me stopping by.”

“Not at all! But you should’ve brought Alfie with you. I haven’t seen him in months.”

I gave her an apologetic look. “You know how he is. It’s difficult to get him to leave the flat at the best of times, never mind visit family.”

Mum frowned, leading me into the kitchen. “Those parents of his really did a number on him.”

“Mum!”

“You know I’m right! Madeline was always a very cold woman. And Raymond was even worse, always working, never home, cheating on Madeline with every new floozy that came along,” said Mum, lifting the glass of wine she was clearly in the middle of enjoying when I knocked.

I had to admit, I sort of loved it when she went all gossipy. I enjoyed hearing scandalous stories about all my aunts and uncles who had always seemed like such boring, staid grown-ups to me as a kid.

Mum smacked her hand to her head like she just remembered something. “Oh, by the way, your student is here, the one your father’s tutoring. They’re just inside the study having a lesson now. I invited him to stay for dinner again. He’s very handsome, don’t you think?” Her eyes sparkled, and I sensed some form of matchmaking in the air.

Little did she know, her efforts weren’t needed. Still, the news that Stu was here at the house had my nerves spiralling. Why couldn’t I just spend a quiet evening at my parents’ house without any emotional entanglements? It was my own fault though. I should’ve remembered it was this day last week that I first brought Stu over to meet Dad.

“He’s my student, Mum,” I said as she pulled a glass from the cupboard and poured me some wine.

“Oh sure, but only for another few months. Besides, your dad and I have been worried about you. You’re still so young, Andrea,” she said, her eyes turning sad as she glanced momentarily at my ring. Most days I forgot it was even there, an unseen comfort blanket. I slid my hand onto my lap, hiding it from her view.

“We all miss Mark very much,” Mum went on. I wished she’d stop with the sad eyes, because she was making me sad and I didn’t need misery lobbed on top of my already frazzled emotions.

“I miss him, too,” I replied quietly, lifting the glass and taking a sip.

Mum studied me, her wise old eyes too perceptive for their own good. Before she could say more, voices sounded from the hallway and a second later Dad and Stu came into the kitchen. I sat by the island, eyes downcast as I tried to think up an excuse to leave. If only Alfie could call me right now with some emergency, I’d love him forever.

“Come in, you two,” said Mum. “I hope everybody’s in the mood for shepherd’s pie.”

“Ah, my favourite,” Dad exclaimed happily while Stu took the stool beside mine. I didn’t have the courage to meet his gaze.

“Would you like a lager, son?” Dad asked. He was big into trying out fancy European brews.

“That’d be great, thanks,” said Stu, his voice making my stomach flutter. The memory of him going down on me was still too fresh in my mind.

“How’d the lesson go?” Mum questioned, one leg crossed over the other as she perched on a stool and delicately sipped her wine. My mother was a tiny woman. I’d taken more after my dad’s side of the family in that sense.

“Wonderfully,” said Dad. “He’s coming on in leaps and bounds. Andrea, I’ve actually been speaking to Stu about applying to one of the undergrad courses at the university. Do you think he’ll be able to qualify as a mature student?”

“Sure. There’ll be a mountain of forms, and he’ll have to pass all his end-of-year exams first, but I don’t see why not,” I answered, chancing a peek in Stu’s direction to find him watching. Yep, still as brooding and darkly handsome as ever.

“You see,” Dad went on, spirited, “we’ll make a mathematician out of you yet.”

“Jim just wants you in the club so you can teach and attract more women into the field,” said Mum, and I shot her a look. Seemingly my mother got flirtatious with a glass of wine in her. Stu grinned.

“Hey now. I’m the only hunk in your life,” Dad complained jokingly as he went to wrap his arm around Mum’s petite shoulders and kiss her cheek. Normally, I found their love for one another endearing, but today I just wasn’t in the right frame of mind. Especially with Stu sitting next to me. My phone continued to burn a hole in my pocket. I was still avoiding checking to see if he’d answered my question.