I reached her house in twice the time it should have taken me but the cold made me move more slowly. I looped around the corner to her room in the back. I pressed my face against the glass and saw her figure underneath the covers in the light of her blinking alarm clock. She hadn’t yet reset it from the power outage last week. She was so cute.

I sighed in relief as I watched her sleeping. I thought about leaving and coming back every hour to check on her because the idea of waking her pained me, but standing in the cold brought me back to reality quickly and I decided to take a chance. I pushed up her window easily, the old locking mechanism was worthless after being broken by Jesse and the new one had yet to be installed.

I clumsily toppled onto her floor making a loud noise and lay frozen on the ground afraid I woke her parents. I didn’t hear any stirring in the room or across the house and then decided shut the window.

I crawled toward her bed and stared at her angelic face for a moment but she woke and sucked in a breath to yell. I plastered my palm to her mouth and that calmed her instantly. The electric shock gave me away and we both waited for either her mom or dad to come streaming into the room, but they were obviously as deep a sleeper as Jules was, must have been inherited.

“What are you doing here Elliott?!” She panted.

“I couldn’t stand knowing you were here alone and that Jesse knew it. I’m here to stay with you until I feel it’s safe enough to leave again.”

She threw her hands around my neck and kissed my cheek.

“My parents picked tonight of all nights to demand I start sleeping in my room again. I haven’t told them about the nightly break ins. They thought it was a one-time deal. I’m surprised I even fell asleep.” She hugged me more tightly, “I’m so grateful you came.”

“I wouldn’t have been able to sleep without knowing how you were.”

I fixed her alarm clock to display the correct time and set the timer for four thirty, half an hour before my dad woke for work. Jules gave me one of her pillows and a few extra blankets and made me a comfortable pallet on the floor. I fell asleep quickly knowing I was near Jules and we both dreamed until the deafening pulse of her electric alarm clock woke us both. I kissed her on the neck my goodbye and she squeezed my hand. I slipped out of the window and ran back to my own bed, my parents none the wiser. I did the same thing Christmas Eve.

Christmas Eve, we decided together, since tangible gifts were out of the question, thanks to Jesse, that our Christmas gifts to each other this year would be a question we couldn’t say no to. It was Jules’ idea, and a good one at that. I got really excited at the prospect of the question but she informed me of the limitations so that ruled out ‘Will you marry me?’

I tried to think of a question and could come up with no loop hole to her addendum. I thought of ‘Will you wear this ring?’ but that would mean it was only a piece of jewelry and not the commitment I wanted from her. (Besides, I didn’t want to trick Jules into marriage. Although, I wasn’t above faking a pregnancy. She’s a traditional gal. She wouldn’t leave me hanging. Nyuck. Nyuck.) So, a ring would have to be at the bottom of my list unfortunately, for several years, I was starting to feel. I was so disappointed.

Surprisingly, my parents hadn’t grounded me for hitting Jesse so I took Jules out to Charleston in the morning so we could finish our own shopping for our families.

“I’m dying to know your question,” I said while we walked hand in hand.

“I’m dying to ask you,” she said.

“You could ask me now, you know?” I teased.

“It wouldn’t be much of a Christmas gift then would it?”

“No, I suppose not,” I sighed.

I had figured out what question I wanted to ask her while laying in bed the night before and I was so proud of it. I couldn’t wait to ask her.

“Elliott?”

“Yes my love?” I asked warily.

“You can’t stay in my room every night. Eventually one of our parents will figure it out.”

“I know Jules, but it’s worth the risk. I refuse to let him get away with frightening you anymore regardless of what others think of him. We know the truth and I’m afraid the truth is a chilling one,” I inwardly shuddered. “Come on,” I said, changing my tone, “I’m buying you a pretzel sweetheart.”

“Just what I need. You know me so well,” she winked. “When Jules is upset, give her carbs.”

“Quiet Jules!  I’m just trying to fill you out a little, you’re looking much too thin these days and I think the anxiety’s to blame.” I kissed her protruding cheekbones. She was growing very thin, her jeans hung on her bones. This was affecting Jules’ health and her body wasn’t the only thing thinning. My patience was running a close second.

On Christmas day, my family woke at the crack of dawn with a squealing Maddy running up and down the hall giddy with excitement. I had slept the night at Jules’ and had only gotten home a few minutes prior. I was still freezing from the walk.

When I tumbled out of bed, I threw on a faded pair of grey sweatpants and I vaguely remember stumbling into the hallway. Maddy grabbed my hand and pulled me down the stairs toward the tree.

My mother always made the most beautiful trees. Always a noble fir, always multicolored lights, chock full of a million homemade ornaments and a million strands of cranberry and popcorn garland that she and Maddy would make after Thanksgiving, a mother and daughter tradition.

Along her ancient tree skirt were peppered boxes and bags, most with Maddy’s name on them, though she didn’t deserve them. She didn’t just get gifts from our parents either. She got them from me, Jules, Jules’ parents, and Jules’ family from Mauch Chunk and Philadelphia. She was certainly spoiled, especially by Jules’ uncommonly generous family.

Maddy was an oddity in Bramwell, not because she was strange although she was, but because she was one of the only kids under the age of twelve here. Most of the families here were established for over thirty years. She was also the youngest child Jule’s family knew since all the kids were grown. She raked in the spoils and she was shameless about it. It was actually kind of funny to watch. I didn’t blame her, not at all.

My parents yawned on the sofa in their pajamas and I took the arm chair next to them and we watched Maddy swim in a sea of wrapping paper and tissue. The tissue and paper danced through the air around her before hitting the ground and was complimented by her singing laughter. Yeah, she could be cute when she wanted to be. I loved her dearly, but I didn’t exactly want her to know that.

She got a crap load of clothes. She liked clothes, even as a toddler. She folded each outfit neatly on the coffee table after displaying it for mom to see. Mom would nod in satisfaction and wait to see the next gift. She wrote down who gave what on a piece of scrap paper for Maddy so she could write her thank you notes.

Those darn thank you notes. My mother drilled that into our heads since we could barely spell our own names. My dad was practically asleep on the couch by the time Maddy was done.

When she was all out of gifts she gathered all her newly gotten gains and placed them in the laundry basket my mom gave her to store her stuff in. Then, she grabbed all the trash on the floor being careful not to throw away anything of value.

Two years ago, she threw away two pairs of shoes for her dolls by accident and never forgave herself for the carelessness of it. So, of course, I laughed when I saw her meticulously crumpling the paper in such a way that it would reveal any needed hidden accessories.

My dad woke up long enough to join us in following the entertaining show.

“I think you might have obsessive compulsive disorder Maddy!” I teased.

Maddy furrowed her eyebrows at me but for only a moment, it was Christmas morning after all and I wasn’t going to ruin her fun I could see that when her eyes softened. She immediately rummaged over the remaining gifts and handed us a gift a piece. She knelt on the floor at the coffee table and ate the cookies we left for Santa. She’d known he didn’t exist for years now. It was tradition and boy was my family traditional in every sense of the word. I didn’t mind though, I liked consistency. A result of having a scientifically inclined way of thinking, or maybe it was the fact that everything in my life at the moment was inconsistent and chaotic, accept for family and my Jules. I was looking for a constant, something to ground me before I went insane. I neatly unwrapped my first gift. It was from my mom and dad. Boxers.

“Figures, you’d open that one first,” my mom laughed.

“But it’s what I’ve been really wanting. Thanks mom. Thanks dad. Now, if I get into a car accident and need to go to the hospital I won’t be embarrassed as mom always says because as we all know the last thing a paramedic needs to be worrying about is my old underwear. God forbid they be distracted by worn out undergarments.”

“Very funny Elliott,” she said. “Here.”

She threw a gift on my lap and I began to unfold the wrapping as neatly as before. Maddy was growing really impatient. She didn’t like the way I unwrapped gifts. When it was all said and done, I’d gotten everything I asked for, which was mainly a bunch of music.

“Thanks mom,” I said, kissing her cheek.

“Thanks dad,” I said, hugging him.

Later in the morning, I was starting to get antsy. I hadn’t really talked to Jules since the evening before at church and we were pretty involved with our own families. During the night, we just slept. I mean, it’s not like we were awake or anything. Anyway, every now and then I’d lean forward in the pew and catch a peek at her smiling and staring through the corner of her eye.

Afterwards, in the youth hall, the entire church convened for a Christmas dinner and that was the little contact I had with her. I decided that I’d call her and wish her family a happy Christmas and see how she was. I picked up the phone and dialed her number. Her dad answered.

“Merry Christmas Mr.Jacobs!”

“Merry Christmas!”

“How has your morning been so far?” I asked that out of politeness, not that I wasn’t genuinely interested. I just wanted to talk to Jules, badly.

“It’s been really pleasant. Did you want to speak to Jules?”

Thank God he said that.

“Sure, thanks. Tell everyone from Pennsylvania I said Merry Christmas!”

“Hello,” said a sleepy Jules.

“Not long,” I heard Jules’ dad say.

“Tired love?” I asked.

“Yeah, I slept so badly last night even with you on the floor next to me,” she barely whispered the last part.

“I’m so sorry babe.”

“It’s okay. No big deal. That’s what naps are for.”

“Alright, I’ll let you go. I know your dad wants you to join them.”

“Wait,” she said.

“Yeah babe?”

“Nothing,” she said.

“What sweetheart?” I insisted.

“Umm. Are we going to see each other later? I’d like to ask you my question.”