“Bullshit.” It’s definitely Marco.

“Frankie, I need you to look at me.” Miss Lorraine.

My eyelids flutter.

It’s dusk, and darkness spreads across the blue-black sky like spilled paint. Miss Lorraine and Sofia kneel next to Marco, whose arms stay clamped around me.

Miss Lorraine brushes the hair away from my face. “I’m going to call your father.”

“No.” I bolt upright, almost smacking my head into Marco’s chin. “My dad’s at work, and he’s already worried about me.”

Miss Lorraine touches Sofia’s shoulder. “Go inside, sweetheart. She’s okay.”

Sofia nods and walks toward the emergency exit. When she’s inside, Miss Lorraine presses her fingers against her temples. “You need to see a doctor. You almost passed out.”

If I don’t explain what happened, she’ll call my dad. But if I do, Marco will find out how screwed up I am.

“Please don’t call.” I rub my hands over my face.

Miss Lorraine’s expression darkens. “Did you take something? Pills or—”

“I don’t do drugs.” I’m out of options. “I have PTSD.”

Marco smooths my hair, and I realize how much he saw. He carried me outside and had a front-row seat to the Frankie Devereux Show.

“I have flashbacks from the night—” I don’t want to say this in front of him.

She rests her hand on top of mine. “I know what happened. You don’t have to talk about it unless you want to.”

I never want to talk about it again unless I can identify Noah’s killer. My eyes burn, but I won’t let myself cry. “When the flashbacks hit, I get dizzy. I’ve seen tons of doctors, and they all say it’s normal.”

Normal if you’re broken and glue isn’t strong enough to hold you together.

“Are you being straight with me, Frankie?” Miss Lorraine’s eyes drill into me.

“I swear.”

“I’m trusting you. Don’t make me regret my decision.” When Miss Lorraine reaches the exit door, she points at me. “And I want to see you before you leave tonight.”

My cell vibrates in my pocket, and I slide off Marco’s lap and sit in the dirt next to him. It’s a text from Lex.

running late. senator’s fault.

Great. Now I get to stay here and answer questions. I chuck the phone, and it lands in a patch of dirt in front of me.

Marco touches my shoulder.

I shove his hand away. “You can go inside. I don’t need a babysitter.”

“I’m not leaving you alone.” Marco hesitates. “That’s what happened the first day we met, when I got into the fight in the quad. You had a flashback?”

Just hearing the word makes me cringe and reminds me that I can’t leave the old Frankie behind. The flashbacks are proof, and now Marco knows they happen all the time.

He knows what a mess I am.

I jump to my feet, desperate to put space between us. “Why do you care if I’m alone or if I have flashbacks? I’m not your problem.”

He stands, too. “What if I want you to be?”

It hits me, and I realize what’s going on. “Why? So you can add me to the list of girls you’ve slept with at Monroe? I hear it’s a long list.”

“Who told you that?”

“Are you saying it’s not true?” I ask as Marco walks toward me. “Or was the Frankie Devereux freak show a turnoff? At least you can tell your friends why the new girl lost her appeal. I don’t want to ruin your track record.”

He looks me in the eyes. “I won’t tell anyone what happened, Frankie.”

“Eventually, you will.”

I imagine walking through the halls, hearing the whispers and feeling the stares. Knowing what a basket case I am is hard enough. How will it feel when the whole school finds out?

Marco closes the distance between us. He touches my face, tracing a path across my jawline and over my bottom lip. “You don’t know me as well as you think. If you give me a chance, I might surprise you.”

CHAPTER 21

NOTHING TO LOSE

“Guess what my mother springs on me last night? Jonathan Strathmore,” Lex says as we drive back from the rec center on Thursday night. It’s seven thirty, and I’m racing for Cruz in less than two hours.

“The idiot from Saint John’s?”

She nods. “The one who wears pastel V-neck sweaters all the time. He looks like he raided the wardrobe of an eighty-year-old golfer. My mom wants me to go to the gala with him.”

“What did you tell her?”

“I said no.” Lex leans over the steering wheel and frowns as she pulls up to Dad’s building. “Isn’t that your mom’s car?”

Mom’s Lexus is parked next to Dad’s Tahoe.

This is not good.

I didn’t expect Dad to be home, let alone both my parents, who can’t stand being together in the same room.

“Do you want me to come in with you?” Lex pulls into the space on the other side of the Tahoe. “Your mom won’t make a scene if I’m there.”

“Yeah, okay.”

When we get to the door, I hold a finger up to my lips, signaling her to be quiet. My parents’ voices are muffled, but they’re talking.

My original plan for tonight was to hop in a cab as soon as Lex dropped me off, but that’s clearly not going to happen now.

I open the door. Mom is perched on the edge of the sofa, and Dad is standing across the room. They both look relieved they aren’t alone anymore.

Mom stands and rushes toward us. “Frankie. It’s so good to see you, sweetheart.” She leans in to hug me, but I pretend not to notice and slip past her. She doesn’t even flinch and turns to Lex. “It’s nice to see you, too, Lex.”

“Thanks, Mrs. Rutherford.”

“What’s going on, Mom?” We both know she wouldn’t show up here without a reason.

“I’ve been trying to reach you, but I keep getting your voice mail. So I decided to stop by and give you the good news myself.”

Dad rubs the back of his neck.

“Richard met with the dean of admissions at Stanford, and he is willing to interview you. Isn’t that fantastic? They rarely grant interviews, but Richard talked him into it.”