“I was Morrighese, Lia. I was a bastard child born to a highborn lord. Now you know why I hate royals. That’s who the Komizar saved me from.”

I stared at him, unable to speak.

No.

It wasn’t true. It couldn’t be.

He threw his cloak around his shoulders. “Now you know who the real barbarians are.”

He turned and left, the door thundering shut behind him, and still I stood there.

His schooling in the holy songs.

His reading.

His flawless Morrighese.

True.

The scars on his chest and back.

True.

But it wasn’t a Vendan who had done this to him, as I had always supposed. It was a highborn lord of Morrighan.

Impossible.

*   *   *

The candle burned out. The lanterns did too. I lay curled in the bed and stared into the dark, reliving every moment, from the time he walked into the tavern, to our long trip across the Cam Lanteux. All the times I marveled at his tender ways that were such a glaring contrast to what he was—an assassin. All the times. The way he was so comfortable in the Morrighese world. It seemed perfectly obvious now. He was reading the games board. It was Vendan he didn’t know how to read, not Morrighese. Pauline and I had both noted how well he sang the holy songs, while Rafe knew none of the words. He had been raised until he was eight as the son of a Morrighese lord.

Kaden’s own kind, my kind, had betrayed him. Except for his mother. She was a saint, he had said. What had happened to her? It must have been from her that he learned his tender ways. It might be she was the only one in his entire life who had shown him any love or compassion—until the Komizar came along.

It was the middle of the night when he returned. The room was completely black, and yet he moved quietly through it as if he could see in the dark. I heard him set something down, a loud thunk, and then I heard the scant ruffling sounds of clothing being laid out and the soft sigh of his breaths as he lay down on the rug. The room was heavy with silence. Long minutes passed. I knew he wasn’t asleep. I could feel his thoughts in the darkness, his stare drilling into the timbers above him.

“Kaden,” I whispered. “Tell me about your mother.”

Her name was Cataryn. She was very young when she was hired on as governess by a lord and his wife, but soon they discovered she had the gift as well. The lady pressed her daily for thoughts on her own young sons, but soon the lord pressed her for other things. Kaden was born and knew no other way of life. He thought it was normal to live in a cottage on his father’s estate. When his mother became ill and her life was quickly withering away, she begged the lord to take Kaden into the manor. The lady would have none of it. A bastard wouldn’t be raised with her noble-bred sons, and even though the lord promised Cataryn he would take Kaden, it seemed he had agreed with his wife all along. His mother wasn’t even cold yet when Kaden was given to passing beggars without a backward glance.

His mother was beautiful, crystal-blue eyes, black hair that was soft and long. Gentle and slow to anger, she was a teacher above all. She tutored Kaden right along with the lord’s sons. At night in the cottage, they looked out the window at the stars, and she whispered the stories of the ages, and Kaden repeated them back to her. He was too young to fully understand why the lord’s sons received special privilege, but when he became angry about it, his mother would gather him in her arms and croon against his cheek that he was far richer in the things that mattered because he had a mother who had more love for him than the whole universe could contain.

But then suddenly, he didn’t have her. He had nothing. One of his biggest regrets was that he bore his father’s white-blond hair and brown eyes. When he looked in a mirror, he at least wanted to see some measure of his mother.

“I see her, Kaden,” I said. “I see her in you every day. From the moment I met you, I saw your calmness, your tender ways. Pauline herself told me you had kind eyes. That’s more important than their color.”

He remained silent except for a low, shaky breath.

And then we both went to sleep.

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

He was up early, before the sun, before stirrings, before clops or neighs or the first birds of morning. It felt as though we had just gone to sleep. He lit a candle and stuffed his saddlebag.

I stretched in my bed and stood, pulling the quilt over my shoulders.

“I’ve left some supplies for you in the bag by the door,” he said. “I raided the kitchen for what food I could so you can leave the room as little as possible. I arranged for Aster, Eben, and Griz to come check on you each day. With luck, we’ll meet the governor on the road and we’ll be back by nightfall.”

“And if you’re not?”

“His province is in the far south of Venda. It’ll be a few weeks.”

So much could happen in a few weeks. In a few days. But I didn’t say it. I could see the same thought in his eyes. I only nodded, and he turned to leave.

I blurted out a question that burned in me when he reached the door. “Which lord was it, Kaden? Who did this to you?”

His hand paused on the latch and then he looked back over his shoulder. “Does it really matter which one? Doesn’t every lord have his bastards?”

“Yes, it does matter. Not every lord is a depraved monster like your father. You can’t stop believing in the good ones.”

“But I have,” he said. His voice was empty of emotion, and his resignation tore through me. He turned back to the door as if to leave, but stood there not moving.