“I thought you were going to die. When that wolf got her nails into you and you went limp…”

So it had been a she-wolf who had attacked me.

“I was playing dead.” I had to stifle a nervous laugh when I heard the words out loud. Desmond wasn’t smiling at all, his hands shaking, and in one fast motion he grabbed me by the shoulders and yanked me out of the chair with such force my head spun.

“You asked me what the negative is for me? When you went limp, I saw every chance I had for happiness die with you. I could stand ten feet away from you for the rest of my life and nothing, not sex or money or power, could match how that feels. Do you get that?” He gave me a shake for emphasis.

I braced my hands against his chest. Where my fingers touched his bare skin, it felt like the dark hair there was made of electric wire. I jerked my hand back for a second knowing he must have felt the shock, but I couldn’t not touch him. I needed to have my hands on him.

All sorts of very human thoughts were running through my head. This is Lucas’s best friend. Isn’t Lucas my boyfriend? No. Is it okay to sleep with someone and say my metaphysical connection to him made me do it? Okay, that’s actually a pretty good excuse.

This close to him, I saw his eyes were not true gray but rather a washed-out violet, which was a pleasant surprise, giving his already striking face a little extra uniqueness. He loosened his grip on me, and I stood flat on the ground again.

“Yes,” I said.

His hands were still on my arms, and I felt like I was on fire and freezing to death at the same time. I shivered. He rubbed my arms with the familiarity of an old habit, warming me with his touch but making the heat move lower as well. My body shuddered.

“Yes?” He had forgotten the question.

I was amazed we even remembered our names with this much static electricity dancing between us. All I kept thinking was, he wants me. And right then what I wanted more than anything was to be wanted. Maybe it was weak of me, but it would make me feel safe and protected, if only for one night.

We were staring at each other for so long I thought my entire being would unravel in his hands. In one breath I was wondering if I’d gotten the signals wrong or imagined the chemistry that was setting fire to the air. Was I misreading anger for passion? In the next breath his mouth was on mine.

I knew now how Lucas had felt when I’d surprised him with my kiss earlier. Though I had anticipated Desmond and I were on the brink of something, I was left breathless by the force of him crushing me against him in the cage of his arms. My hesitation didn’t last. Unlike my comparatively tame embrace with Lucas, neither Desmond nor I were fully clothed to begin with and the bed was not across the room. It was only tripping distance away.

He was kissing me so hard his teeth clicked against mine, and for a few ragged moments it felt like we were trying to consume each other. My lips were bruised by the intensity of his mouth, and small noises I wasn’t aware of making emerged from the back of my throat. I deepened the kiss, wanting more from it than a mere kiss was capable of giving. I clawed at his back, trying to rid him of a shirt he wasn’t wearing. Logic had flown out the window long ago, replaced by wanton need. My body was pressed so tightly to his I couldn’t breathe without feeling the pressure of his ribs grazing mine.

A major problem I’d encountered in having functional relationships with human men was my overabundant enthusiasm in the bedroom. At first they thought it was great, albeit a little rough, but ultimately they could never keep up. I had a lot of stamina, and it wore human men out too quickly. Judging by the way Desmond held me by my thighs and lifted me like I was weightless, I didn’t figure longevity was going to be a problem here.

Desmond stumbled onto the bed, and it groaned under the weight of us. I straddled his chest and stooped low so my mouth never had to leave his. He was kissing me so hard it hurt in the good way. There was so much need and intensity it made me rub myself against him harder, insisting on more.

His hands moved down my back when he found he no longer needed to hold me to him, and his fingers fumbled, sliding over the slippery surface of my robe. Instead of fighting with the garment, he tore apart the silk and discarded the remnants.

“I needed a new one anyway.”

He growled when my lips left his, then flipped me over so he was on top, the weight of him very comfortable, making my mind race with promising ideas. I arched my hips upwards and dodged his kiss so I could look him in the eyes. My heartbeat was wild, matching the rhythm of his own. Taking his face between my palms while I made him meet my gaze, I tucked my feet under the waistband of the sweatpants and pushed them down.

With my legs secured around his waist, he pressed hard against my pelvis. I let out a shuddering breath. Everywhere our skin touched was like fireworks going off, and just as with Lucas earlier I could barely control myself.

“Yes.” I licked his bottom lip.

I released his face, and he didn’t hesitate before pushing me down into the mattress with another bone-jarring kiss. My legs loosened their grip and his hips arched backwards for a moment before he entered me. This time he withdrew from the kiss first, his fingers tangled in my hair. The look on his face was so intimate my heart tripped. There was a peacefulness to him I’d never seen before, like all the pain he’d been carrying around since we’d met had vanished. I could have stayed like that forever to watch him smile at me, because everything about his sweet, dreamy look made me believe I was completely wanted. I touched his cheek and drew him close, feeling him slide inside me with an aching slowness.

I gasped, clawing at his back, trying to keep him there to maintain the electric fullness that made my body spark like a lit firecracker ready to explode. He pulled out and I whimpered.

“More,” I insisted, and he chuckled in reply, pushing back into me. “Oh!” He put his whole weight against my body as he found a rhythm that met the demands of my writhing hips.

As his pace picked up, my hand clamored for the headboard and something solid to brace myself. My eyes fluttered shut and rolled back, and my spine arched into the rising sensation. The flavor on my tongue was so tart and overwhelming it stung. Behind my eyes bright green flashes started to appear, first as a dim glow, but with our rising fervor they blossomed and flared into sparkling pinpricks in shades of lime and chartreuse.

One hand left the headboard, twining in his thick hair, which was damp with sweat. At first I just raked my fingers through the soft brown waves, but as his teeth grazed my clavicle, tonguing the dip at the base of my throat, my grip tightened so I held the strands in a clenched fist. It did nothing to slow him down, and his mouth closed on one of my nipples. My lips parted in a soundless moan as he put one of my legs over his shoulder and found a way to get that extra inch inside me. I thought I was forming words until I realized the sound coming out of my throat was a howl.

One of the metal posts on the headboard snapped in my hand as we both came. Desmond collapsed on top of me, growling. Both of our chests were heaving, and we were slick with sweat.

He wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his head on my stomach, his hair tickling my still-sensitive breasts. His violet-gray eyes studied me, and he smiled in a way that promised to stop my heart. He climbed up the bed to lie next to me, and I let myself be folded into the safety of his arms. I nuzzled against his chest and breathed deeply, inhaling his musky wolf scent with its overtones of bright citrus.

It was past sunrise now and my body could no longer ignore its most basic need. With Desmond’s arms around me and the sound of his heartbeat in my ear, I succumbed to sleep.

Chapter Twenty-One

I woke up alone.

Confronted with a flood of memories, I reached my hand out to touch the empty space on the bed next to me. I raised my head and looked at the rumpled sheets.

The clock told me it had been hours since Desmond and I drifted off, and I’d slept through the day. It wasn’t impossible for me to wake during daylight hours, but my nocturnal schedule meant I was typically asleep when the sun was up. It worked better that way, since the evil day star drained my energy like crazy.

I grabbed for my robe, but the shredded bits of a silk explosion were all that remained. Desmond’s bloodstained clothes were no longer next to the bed. The only evidence of him was the smell lingering on my skin and sheets.

I dressed without much thought to what I was putting on—a thin tank top, a black hooded sweatshirt and my second favorite jeans. I guess they were my first favorite jeans now that my other had met a bloody and tragic end.

I padded barefoot into the living room and my heart stopped.

Holden was sitting on my loveseat with his arm casually stretched across the back. He wasn’t looking at me. Instead, his cold gaze was fixed on two werewolves, one sitting in the armchair, the other leaning against the fireplace. Lucas and Desmond weren’t looking at me either. They stared back at Holden.

Oh holy mother of fuck. This was bad.

All three of them seemed to hear me enter at the same moment. The wolves looked at me, but Holden remained still, speaking first. “Secret, if you needed guard dogs, I’m sure Sig could have arranged something for you.”

Desmond growled at him, but Lucas just kept looking at me, his jaw set tight.

In the pit of my stomach something twisted. I was anticipating I would feel guilty for what Desmond and I had done, but instead I was overcome with a relief so strong it washed away everything else I might have felt.

“You’re okay.” I let out the breath I hadn’t known I was holding.

“Yes. Marcus and some of his men got away. Genevieve’s club is a little worse for wear, and there were casualties on both sides, but I think he has been subdued for now.” His eyes flickered from me to Holden. If he knew about Desmond, which he must considering the whole apartment smelled like us, he wasn’t going to say anything about it here. “Mr. Chancery here insisted he has business with you.” There was something disbelieving in the way he said business.

Chancery? Wow. I hadn’t heard someone say Holden’s human surname in years.

“Um.” Having all three of these men with me in one small room, I felt naked in spite of layers of clothing. “How long has everyone been here?”