“‘What counts is what a man does with his life and for others,’” I replied, repeating his own words. “And Cadan has earned my trust ten times over.”

“He’s not as lost as he used to be. I think he’s finally found the right trail.”

“Are you one of the psychics?” I asked. “Is that how you know him?”

Judah shook his head. “No. Cadan told me about them, though. No, I found him torn to pieces up the mountain one day, a long time ago. Thought a bear mauled him. Looked like he’d dragged himself a long way, but he was out cold when I came across him. I tossed him over my horse and rode back to the house. Grace helped me stop as much of the bleeding as we could, but even before we got him in the truck to drive him to the hospital, we noticed somethin’ was strange about that boy. Skin don’t just knit itself back together without a needle and thread. We didn’t know what to make of it. By the time he came to, he was almost completely healed, save for the brand-new scars all over his back. I guessed he must have had a hell of a day, barely surviving a bear attack and a fire. Grace is sick of my Smokey jokes, though, so I’ll spare you.”

“But it was a Grigori Lord,” I said.

“That’s what he called it too,” Judah continued. “We never learned about them in church. All that stuff’s in Enoch’s book and Pastor Jim don’ like that one. Anyway, that boy we found had a lot of explainin’ to do. After what we’d seen, it wasn’t too difficult to accept what he told us. He stayed here for a few weeks and didn’t seem to ever want to leave. He said the ones he would return to empty-handed would be very angry with him, and that no one like Grace and me would be there to make sure he heals safely.”

“So he told you everything?” I asked, wholly surprised. “About the reapers, about my role, and the angels and the Fallen?”

“Yep. He said the book he was lookin’ for up the mountain would be the thing that stops you in the end, you the killer of his kind. It’s been interestin’ over the years, watchin’ him linger and never age as I get old and tired. He’s changed a lot in other ways. He told me what the demonic reapers do to humans, but he’s never once harmed us and I believe him when he says he has only fought other reapers. I used to ask him, ‘Boy, why do you think that Prey-lee-what’s-it kills you reapers? There’s a reason why you don’ hunt humans. You think it’s wrong, and so does she. Don’ that make sense?’ So, I guess it did, ’cause now you’re sittin’ in my kitchen eatin’ my wife’s pulled pork sandwiches.”

I felt my eyes burn, but before any emotion broke through, footsteps sounded through the house. Cadan and Grace returned.

“Everything looks good,” Cadan said to me. “Are you about ready?”

I gave him a smile but I felt it tremble. “Yeah. Let’s go get the horses.”

We followed Judah out of the house and into the barn. The air smelled thickly of hay, and in the aisle were three tied-up horses. Two horses were being saddled with heavy Western gear while the third was already loaded with camping equipment and a couple extra bags.

“You’ll be on Peewee,” Judah said to me, and patted the fat belly of a cute bay mare with stockings. She turned her head to shove at his pockets for a treat. “Cadan, you take Savvy.”

“You’re letting me ride Savvy?” Cadan asked. “I’m honored, Judah. Thanks.”

“How long will we be out there?” I asked, peeking into a couple bags on the pack horse named Star and finding food and water. I scratched the horse’s furry face and moved on to give Cadan’s gray gelding a pat on the neck.

“Two days’ ride,” Cadan replied. “And hopefully two days back. We’ll camp comfortably, I promise.”

Instinctively, I wanted to crack a joke back at him about our differences in the definition of comfort, but as I slid my hand down the horse’s neck, the warm silk of its coat brought on another painful sting to my eyes. I remembered my dream with Will so vividly that when I closed my eyes for an instant, it was the coat of a white horse in France that I touched and not that of this big gray gelding named Savvy. Will had promised me months ago that he would take me riding someday. I was supposed to be with him right now and not with someone else.

“Are you okay?” Cadan was right beside me, his head dipped low and close to mine, the breath of his words against my hair.

I tried to look up at him, but a glance was all I could muster and I rested my cheek against the horse’s shoulder. His leg stomped at a fly and he gave his head a good shake. My fingers twined around his mane as he turned his head to nuzzle at my pockets.

“Let’s get going,” I said, and put my back to Cadan. I would not cry. I wouldn’t allow myself to. All Cadan wanted was to comfort me. He was sweet, but the only thing that could comfort me right now was finding Antares and getting her to heal Will.

The constantly overcast sky during the day and thick forest canopy were a blessing for Cadan. I’d worried about him being in the sun, but he seemed to handle it fine as long as he didn’t cross into direct sunlight. By the time twilight had fallen and the clouds went away to reveal a beautiful starry sky, my entire body felt like I’d fallen all the way down this mountain instead of having ridden a horse all the way up it. How could anything make someone so sore?

Suddenly all three of the horses’ bodies grew stiff and jittery as they snorted, their breaths billowing in the cold air. They danced, fearful, and made slow rumbling noises and spun in the trail. Their hooves kicked up snow and they looked around themselves, wild-eyed and terror-stricken. I pulled hard on the reins to keep Peewee from taking off beneath me, but she, Savvy, and Star were ready to bolt any second.