“I’ve had fun,” Lily said. “I’m going to use the picture of Rider to blackmail him with later when he’s bugging me at work.” Beth had taken a picture of Rider dressed as Tarzan as he did the dishes upstairs and had texted the picture to Lily.

“You do that. Just don’t tell him who sent you the picture.”

“I won’t.”

Shade was talking to Train and Evie as Lily yawned, finally growing tired.

“I’m going to bed. I have to be up early to go to the church store.”

Everyone told her goodnight, and then Lily went into the bedroom. Her mind played back over the evening as she changed into her pajamas and went to the bed, stretching out over it.

She was almost asleep when Shade quietly came to bed not long afterwards. When he reached out underneath the covers, pulling her to his warmth, she didn’t pull away. She just let her body sink against his, falling asleep with a tiny smile on her lips.

It was funny how one simple Halloween party had given her hope for the future.

Chapter 23

“Wake up, Lily!” Shade was shaking her awake from a deep sleep.

She jerked upright in the bed. “What’s going on?”

“Get up. The basement’s on fire.” He jerked her from the bed.

She slid her feet into her shoes while Shade ran to the bathroom, coming back with a fire extinguisher. She heard the sounds of screams from upstairs and running feet as the fire alarm went off.

“How are we going to get out of here?” The windows in his room were nonexistent. They were trapped inside.

“The brothers will get us out,” Shade said grimly.

Going to his dresser, he pulled out a long piece of material and then ran to the bathroom again. He came back with the wet cloths, tying one across her face then his own. Just as he finished, they heard the sounds of a fire hose and an extinguisher from outside their bedroom door.

There was a loud bang on the door and Shade opened it. Viper stood on the other side with just jeans and boots on. “Let’s go,” he yelled.

Shade took Lily’s hand, pushing her behind Viper as he followed. It was pitch dark except for the dying embers of the blackened walls. Viper was carrying a flashlight and the men putting out the fire with water hoses were spraying the smoking couch. The steps to the upstairs were destroyed, the blackened door closed.

Viper led them out the side door as Lily choked on the smoke, starting to cough. Shade picked her up into his arms, carrying her into the living room before removing the cloth he had tied around her face.

The screams, the smoky smell and the dark basement she had walked through combined to send Lily into a terror-filled haze she didn’t know if she could fight.

She quit coughing, drinking the water that someone thrust into her hands. The smell of the smoke was attacking her senses. This wasn’t the first time she had smelled that odor or had seen how flames could destroy.

The door so tightly locked in her mind snapped open.

The glass in her hand dropped to the floor as her skull filled with a blaze of pain there was no way to escape any longer.

Shade dropped down to his knees in front of Lily. He knew it was bad. He had witnessed the gradually spiraling ferocity of her panic attacks, and was certain this was the worst he had seen. Seeing Beth’s terror for her sister, his assumption that it was indeed the worst was confirmed.

“Razer, call Rachel and tell her to get here as fast as she can. Beth, call her doctor.” Shade could do nothing except hold on to the woman he loved more than life itself as her tortured screams scored his soul with the agony that he couldn’t help her.

His friends stood back, giving him space as she fell to the floor. All he could do was hold her, calling her name repeatedly as soothingly as possible.

Beth returned, falling to her knees beside him, calling for Lily as she held her hand. It seemed like forever, each minute ticking by endlessly, until Rachel ran through the door that Cash was holding open.

“Move out of her way,” Cash ordered everyone.

Shade didn’t make a move to release Lily whose voice had broken from her screams of terror.

Rachel motioned Shade to move over, and he complied shakily. She sat down on the floor by Lily’s head, pulling her head onto her lap. Her graceful hands went to Lily’s temples, pressing her fingers along them, rubbing in soothing circles.

Everyone went silent then as Rachel’s hushed voice spoke to Lily. “Lily, what do you need me to do?”

* * *

Lily heard the voices calling to her, but she didn’t know how to reach them; she couldn’t find them in the darkness. The flames were preventing her from reaching them. How could it be so dark yet be filled with flames? She was adrift. She was one of those people you hear about who died when they’re lost because they wandered away. Then, when their lifeless body was found, help had been invariably just a few feet away.

She needed to stay still so they would come and get her. Shade would come.

Where is he? Shade? Shade! Where are you, Shade? Was I bad? Is that why you’re not here? Shade, please help me. I’m so scared.

Beth, please, I won’t be mad at you anymore. I’ll be good, I promise. Please, Beth. I want to go home. Please. Beth! Shade! Help me!

Razer? Razer! You promised me no one would hurt me. You broke your promise. Razer, please help!

Shade! Shade!

Pastor Dean!

Please help me?

Vida?

Sawyer?

Where are you? Why did you leave me? Vida! Sawyer! Please help me.

Shade… Shade…

“Lily.” At first, Lily thought she was imagining the calm voice from the other side of the flames. She quit screaming, listening again.

There it was. Someone was there.

“I’m here! I’m here! Help me!”

“What do you need me to do?” The voice was coming closer. Someone was there!

“Help me! I’m lost! I can’t find my way back!”

“Yes, you can.”

“The flames won’t let me pass, and I’m afraid to go the other way in the dark. I’m afraid I’ll get lost.”

“I won’t let you get lost, Lily.”

“But you’re on the other side of the flames,” Lily cried out then watched as Rachel walked through the flames without them touching her.

“How did you do that without getting burned?”

“They’re not my memories, Lily. They can’t hurt me, only you.”

“I want to get out of here.” She whimpered, “Can you help me?”

“Yes, but you have to lead the way, Lily. I don’t know where we are.”

“Then we’re both lost. I want to go home.” Lily started crying again.

“Listen to me. There is only one path home and that’s through the flames. You have to be brave enough to take those steps, Lily.”

“I can’t go through there!” Lily screamed.

“Then you’re going to stay lost. You can do this, Lily.”

“No, I can’t!”

“Lily, your memories have broken free. There is no locking them away anymore. The only way to avoid it is to stay lost. You have to go through the flames.”

“They’ll hurt me again!”

“No one is ever going to hurt you again. Didn’t The Last Riders save you tonight? They’re not going to let anyone hurt you again. You know that deep in your heart.” Rachel turned her to face the flames.