’Course, I’d woken up alone in the bed, night fallen in full and the hair tie loose around my single tail, her gold hair gone.

I pulled out of the water and twisted my hair up, tucking it under my cap with the good memories of Joanna. That’s where I liked to keep her, secret and safe.

My clothes were sooty, but it were cold so I wriggled back into them and then came beside Rob. He had already taken his cloak off, and he put it on my shoulders. His arm dropped to the rock behind me so he were caging me.

“I missed you.”

I got that funny, twisted feeling in my stomach. ’Course he missed me. I were a member of the band and they didn’t work well without me. It weren’t nothing more he meant, and I were a ready fool to have my heart lurch with other hopes. “But you knew what I were ’bout.”

“I knew that you were atoning to yourself, however you meant to do it.”

“I stole things from the castle to sell,” I said.

He smiled. “Never idle. John thought you’d been collared.”

“You have more faith in me.”

He shook his head. “I don’t, really. You scare the hell out of me.

“Tonight were good timing,” I admitted.

He nodded. “You would have gotten out anyway.”

“How’d you know I hadn’t been collared?”

He shrugged. “I’d have felt it. I’d have known.”

Whether it were that strange idea or the cold, something lodged in my chest and my breath were gasping round it.

“Let’s get you home.” He stood and looked out over the lake. “If you’re ready to come back.”

The thought of who else waited back at the camp pushed into my head, and I rubbed my knuckles. “Why would John kiss me, Rob?” It just jumped out of my mouth. I looked at him.

He crossed his arms. “Aren’t you two—” He closed his mouth sharp. “The other night, you were sleeping together.”

I blushed hot. “It weren’t like that. I were shaking, and he were trying to warm me up.” I felt his eyes on me, but I didn’t want to look at him. I didn’t think he believed me. He saw how black my soul were—why wouldn’t he think my virtue were easy as they come?

“He likes you, Scar. You shouldn’t toy with him.” The words were awful sharp, and I looked up.

“I’m not toying!” I snapped back. “And just ’cause he wants me don’t mean I want him.”

Rob’s eyebrows went skyward. “You don’t?”

I wrapped my arms around my stomach. “Not sure.” There were so much more to the thought that I wanted to tell him, but I just swallowed. “I’m not the sort of girl that goes with a lad.”

Rob smiled. “So what, you’ll swear off men forever?”

“It’s worked so far.”

Rob looked surprised, but before I could ask why, he said, “Well, what about babies? You looked awfully thrilled with Mary’s son.”

“You think I have any right to bring a baby into my life? I’m a thief and an outlaw and a poor example of a girl. You think I could be any sort of mother?”

He looked away at that, and I felt it again, that ax of hurt in my belly. I didn’t much like saying it out loud, but it were worse that he agreed.

“If you want a man, Scar, for marrying or not, John’s the best you can come by.”

I know it sounded nice, but to me it were a pretty insult. Like it or not, I would never deserve a man like Rob, and John were the best I could do. I knew it were true, but hearing him say it like that, so careful, made me feel hollowed out like a dying tree. I didn’t want him to see, so I smiled big and gave a little laugh. “That’s not fair true. John’s a charmer.”

Rob shrugged. “Well, if he charms you, that’s enough, isn’t it?”

I shot him a look and didn’t say nothing.

“As to babies, don’t fool yourself, Scar.”

Shame filled my face and I looked down. I weren’t the sort to fool myself, to be sure.

“You’d be an uncommonly good mother,” he said.

I looked up, blood filling up my cheeks ’stead of shame. He looked fast away from me, and I stood, wanting this chat to be over. “Let’s go.”

When we came to the cave, the lads were around a small fire under the rock overhang, and they both stood up. I crossed my arms, feeling like I ought to apologize for something, but I weren’t ’bout to. Much laughed with surprise and ran over to hug me, and I gave him a little smile and hugged back.

When he let go, John were standing behind him, and he looked at me with a smile. “So, you’re back.”

I laughed. “Not for you, John Little.”

He looked like I slapped him.

“Just because you kissed me don’t mean I’m your girl none,” I told him.

I heard Much chuckle, and John stepped closer to me. “Maybe I wasn’t asking you to be my girl.”

“I’m nobody’s bit of fun either,” I told him, right serious ’bout that. I went toward the fire, and John threw up his arms.

“What does that mean, Scar?” he asked me.

“I guess we’ll have to see.”

Rob and Much both laughed at this, and John glared at them. “Will one of you talk to her?”

Rob shook his head. “I don’t get on the wrong side of a lady thief.”