For once, Wyatt is quiet, or maybe we just don’t hear him. Because right now, all that I can see, hear, and feel is Zachary Hennington. I don’t know how I can resist him, if I want to, if I should, but being here right now tells me I know what I’ll do. I think he knows it too.

“Well.” Wyatt claps his hands loudly. “I’m going up to start, you know . . . working. You two have your silent staring contest and bring up the herd from the back. Vance and I will lead.”

I draw in a deep breath and nod. “Ready?” I ask Zach.

Instead of answering, he moves forward. “Take a swing, Pres. What’s the worst that happens?”

“You hurt me.”

“I won’t.”

“I don’t think you will on purpose, but you don’t know what the future holds.”

Zach lets out one short laugh. “I do though. I know that every part of my future includes you. When you came back into town, it was like my world settled. You were always supposed to be a part of my life, but I wasn’t ready for you then.”

My heart aches and hope blooms deep within me. Could it really be that we were not ready back then? They say everything happens for a reason, maybe we couldn’t have made it work, and that was our sign. It still doesn’t answer whether I’m ready to open myself up. That wouldn’t be fair to either of us.

“Hey,” he says, drawing me out of my mind. “No answers now. Just know that I’ll wait for you.”

Zach winks and rides off toward the cattle. I look to the sky and close my eyes. “Why can’t you send me a sign?” I ask whoever is up there.

I pull the reins tight and head toward the guys. It’s time to work. I have at least nine hours for deep reflection today.

It takes about an hour to get the cows to actually move where we want. They’re slow today. Bringing up the herd is a little more difficult, but Zach and I work well together. Each straggler gets pushed to the pack, and we find a rhythm.

I’m grateful for the fifteen or so cows between us. It gives me time to my own thoughts. I wonder if Zach is ready to even take on two boys who recently had their world crushed. They’re not going to be easy to win over. They loved their father very much, and they have a lot of residual issues.

Wyatt falls back and catches my attention. “I need you over on the left.”

“Huh?”

“The left. Zach needs a little help.” He smirks at his own joke.

Sure, he does. “He’s just fine.”

“Well, I’m the foreman and I say go on the left.”

“I’m the owner’s sister.”

He narrows his eyes. “I’m still your boss.”

“The hell you are. Why are you doing this?” I ask.

“Because you’re stubborn. You have a good man who loves you right in front of you. And you’re going to spend the next however many hours talking yourself in and out of this aren’t you.” His brow rises. “That’s what I thought,” he tacks on at the end.

I sigh. He doesn’t get it. I don’t know how anyone can because this isn’t cut and dry. “So you think letting him push me is the right thing?”

“I think you’re both scared. He knows that you lost your husband, and you have Cayden and Logan. He’s aware of what all of that means. I made damn sure he did. Did he fuck up when he was a kid? No. He was given the promise of a big ass check and a chance to play ball for his life.” Wyatt stops, giving me a chance to swallow that one. In the back of my mind, I’ve always known that. But the broken woman in me wouldn’t accept it. Wyatt doesn’t know everything. “If you’d rather give another Hennington a chance, I’m always here.”

“You and I would never work. You know that,” I say gently.

“I know. You’ll always love Zach, so why are you still over here? Go love him.”

I wish it were that simple.

Begrudgingly, I head over to the left. “Wyatt said you needed help on this side.”

“Did he?” Zach grins. “Sometimes he’s not half bad.”

“Sometimes.”

We both move slowly, waiting to see if we get a rogue cow. Zach takes the first step. “There’s a lot we need to talk about. You said some stuff that night when we were outside. I’ve let you have some time, but you can’t keep living like this.”

My muscles tense as I see where this is going. Talking about Todd’s death is the absolute last thing I want to do. “I’m doing everything I need to.”

“I need to know where your head is at. You’re lying to everyone, but I’m not everyone.”

Since I told him the truth, I’ve wondered why. Why would I tell the one person who I really didn’t want to know? Of everyone that I could’ve let it slip to, it was Zach. It made no sense other than that somewhere in my heart, I needed him to know. Maybe I knew he wouldn’t wield the information against me like a sword. Zach wouldn’t judge.

“No,” I agree. “You’re not.”

That doesn’t mean I can talk about this. I’ve buried parts of that day so deep, I don’t even know where to find them. Bringing it up, facing it, could wreck me all over again. The nightmares and the visions of my husband are painful. Right now I’m angry. I’ve held on to that feeling to get through the days. To bring back the sadness would be too difficult.

“All I’m asking is that you don’t treat me like them. As worried as you are about what our future might—or might not—hold, I’m feeling the same shit, Pres. I’m fully aware that I was the one who left. I live with that regret every damn day. But you fucking broke me.”

I look over with a ton of questions. “I broke you?”

“Yeah.” He looks heavenward before his gaze locks on me. “I loved you. You were the reason I was taking that position with the Dodgers. I wasn’t doing it just for me!”

“I know you think that. If I had left that college for you, I would’ve been a fool. People already thought I was for giving up the school I wanted to follow you. I didn’t want to spend my entire life chasing your dreams. There’s no way we could’ve done another two plus years with you traveling, the girls throwing themselves at you, and me finishing school.”

He rubs his shoulder as he takes a minute to respond. “We could’ve lasted. Or maybe not. We won’t ever know because you didn’t give us that chance. You think I’m the only one to blame?”

“I have for a long time. I felt like I was dying inside without you. You were such a deep part of who I was that when you left I was empty. Todd was visiting Angie that weekend and he held me while I sobbed. It’s how we became anything. He held together the pieces of me that you destroyed.”

There’s truth in what he said before. The minute he left—I gave up. I was young and dumb too, and I jumped right into a relationship with Todd. God, I was so afraid of being alone.

But my life with Todd wasn’t bad. We had love, children, happiness, and I would’ve grown old with him.

“I would’ve held you.”

“Not from California,” I remind him.

“No, I guess not.”

We fall silent as we ride slowly. There are things that I need to deal with to move forward. Not only with Zach, but in my life. He’s right to be wary. My heart is still heavy with loss but also filled with anger toward so many.