Ruthless Game Page 32
Kane’s arms were comforting, as was his scent. She stayed right where she was, straddling his hips, her thighs hugging his, feeling safe, even as she felt totally exposed. He stroked her hair, his hands gentle. She always found his gentleness surprising. He was a big man and looked as dangerous as hell. She wasn’t used to gentleness or caring. She hadn’t known she could feel the way she did about anyone, let alone a man.
Because of Kane, she had Sebastian. She had a home. A life. At least the opportunity for those things if she had the courage to see it through.
“Are you crying, sweetheart?” Kane asked.
His tone, unfailingly understanding, made her want to weep the tears that remained gathered behind her eyes. “Not exactly. It’s just that you’ve given me so much, Kane.”
His hand stilled in her hair. “It’s the other way around, Rose. I wasn’t fully alive until you came into my life. I wasn’t unhappy, but then I didn’t know enough to be. You showed me what life could be like.”
Rose’s heart took a slow, somersaulting turn. He’d described in words exactly how she felt about her life. She knew the few soldiers she’d met felt sorry for her, but neither she or her “sisters” felt that way about their lives. They didn’t know any other way to live. They had enjoyed many aspects of their childhood. It had been harsh and even at times cruel, but they had been close and enjoyed the physical activities they excelled in.
Now, after feeling an alien in a strange world when she’d been on her own, she realized she hadn’t known real happiness. Kane had shown that to her. He had brought her so much, and if he ever betrayed her ...
A small sob escaped, and she clamped down on it immediately, ashamed of her weakness.
“Baby,” Kane soothed. “Listen to me. You have to look at me while I tell you this. I know when you look into my eyes, you know when I’m speaking the truth.”
Baby. He’d never called her by that specific endearment. She wasn’t a baby, but she felt newly born. The caress in his voice shook her almost as much as the tenderness. Rose took a deep, steadying breath and forced herself to lift her head. If he hadn’t heard what her body had said to him, he would see it when he looked into her face. She loved him with every breath she took, and she was terrified. She’d put herself into his hands without meaning to do so, and now he had all the power.
Kane’s green eyes searched her face for what seemed a long time before meeting her gaze steadily. “I can only guess how scared you are right now, Rose. I am too. Not of Whitney. Not of being a father. I can handle both of those things, but of you—us. I’ve never felt so vulnerable to another human being. You have my heart, Rose. It sounds stupid and corny and I’m not that kind of man to say pretty words women like to hear, but if I could—if I could find the right way to say you terrify me without sounding like an idiot—I would.”
Happiness swept through her. He was right; she could see the na**d truth in his eyes. She liked that he deliberately made himself so vulnerable to her, exposing his feelings and trusting that she wouldn’t ... betray him. He was telling her he understood, taking the chance before she could find the courage.
She found his mouth almost blindly, melting into him, uncaring that her milk was beginning to flow, something that embarrassed her and made her feel decidedly not glamorous or sexy. She felt his firm lips heat, and her heart skittered in her chest. Kissing him was rather like tumbling into a beautiful dream. She could kiss him forever, for always. His hand bunched in her hair, sending a thrill down her spine. There was an instant response, his arms turning to steel, caging her, his mouth moving over hers, deepening the kiss until she thought her heart might explode from her chest.
She raised her head slightly and looked down at him, the tip of her tongue sliding along his bottom lip, savoring the taste of him. “I’m scared too, Kane,” she admitted. “I thought you were a logical choice for the father of my baby.” A slight smile welled up. “You’re very good-looking, and you have strength of character and integrity. There’s no cruelty in you. No subterfuge. I thought we’d live together and be happy and comfortable.”
She watched the smile soften his beautiful mouth and creep into the vivid green of his eyes. “Comfortable?” he repeated and squirmed a little so that she felt him, semi-hard, moving deep inside her. “That might not be the best word to describe us together.”
The sensation along with that teasing, suggestive grin, set off tiny explosions throughout her body. “My point exactly. My body’s reaction to you might be more than I expected, but with Whitney pairing us, I knew we’d be compatible sexually. I just didn’t know how deeply I would feel about you. I thought it was too soon. Too fast. But I realize it’s been growing in me since the very first day I saw you.”
“We’re in this together.” His voice was so tender, so gentle, she almost felt the sound like a caress washing over her skin. “And it will get rough, Rose. Whitney isn’t going to let up just because we found each other. If something happens, you know I’ll never stop looking for you. I would find both you and Sebastian. I’d come for you.”
She studied his face. He hadn’t raised his voice. There was a quiet strength in Kane. A core of steel. He would never back down, never swerve from his chosen path. She shivered, thankful that she was his chosen path.
“I know that,” she replied, surprised that the conviction was strong in her.
“You have to trust me, no matter how bad it gets, Rose. We can do it if we’re together. That’s the entire point of a pairing. We should have all the tools to defeat anything or anyone in battle together. He manipulated our DNA and enhanced us both physically and psychically to fit together in every conceivable situation, so together we’re strong.”
Whitney had always been the all-powerful figure in her life. She’d never conceived of the idea of actually defeating him. She had run, but in the back of her mind, she’d accepted the idea that in the end he would reacquire her. She had wanted to make it as difficult as possible, and if she could, hide the baby where Whitney could never find him. She even accepted that Whitney might kill her for her actions, but always, she knew, he loomed large, a dark threat that would ultimately find her.
She reached down and rubbed at the tattoo she’d grown so fond of. Instantly Kane covered her hand with his. “Did you tell Mack or Javier about the satellite?”
She nodded uneasily. “Javier and Jaimie spent some time looking at it. I didn’t mention because ... well ...” Her voice drifted off. The truth was, Whitney already knew where she was, and Kane had been unconscious a lot of the time. The tattoo had become the least of her problems.
The doctor, who she distrusted on principle, had performed a three-hour surgery while she paced, nearly inconsolable, outside the door of the makeshift operating room. The last few weeks, she’d immersed herself in caring for Kane and the baby, and for once in her life, she’d allowed herself to think of nothing else, not even the threat of Whitney.
Jaimie McKinley, who owned the building, had been nice to her, shopping for clothes and baby items, but nothing had mattered but Kane’s recovery. She’d barely forced herself to get sleep, afraid if she closed her eyes, he would die. She’d kept Sebastian with them every minute, uncaring that the doctor wanted her to rest or that everyone had offered to watch the baby for her. Rather than accept help, she’d kept them all together.
Jaimie brought meals, and men poked their heads in constantly to check on Kane, but she tried to ignore them, terrified but determined. She didn’t want to admit she hadn’t been exactly cooperative with his friends.
A strobe went off, flashing in the bedroom, a signal the front door had been opened. Automatically, she slid off Kane and reached for her robe and the gun she kept inches from her fingertips.
“Sweetheart, no one has the code but family,” Kane said. “You just can’t break Jaimie’s codes.”
“Nevertheless.” She crept silently across the floor and stood to one side of the door, the gun ready.
Chapter 12
“Dr. Lambert is here to check the baby, Rose,” Jaimie McKinley called out, knocking even as she pushed open the door to the living area. “You decent?”
Rose tightened her hold on the gun and threw Kane an anxious look. “Why does he have to keep checking him?” she hissed, indignant. “He’s a normal baby. The man acts like he’s going to grow horns and a tail the way he carries on all the time.”
“Be right out,” Kane called, shifting off the bed. “Sebastian is sleeping peacefully.” He winced a little as he made his way toward the bathroom. “Offer them coffee.” He stuck his head around the door. “But put some clothes on first. I don’t want to have to kill anyone.”
“Offer them coffee,” Rose muttered under her breath and dragged on her clothes as quickly as she could. She was a mess. Seed running down her thighs and milk dripping from her br**sts. She hurried to the doorway of the bathroom. “I can’t possibly ...” She broke off, seeing the laughter in Kane’s eyes. He had pulled on a pair of jeans, and he grinned at her, clearly teasing. “You’re so horrible.”
He bent his head to brush a kiss over her upturned mouth as he passed her. “The shower’s all yours.”
She cast an anxious look toward the sleeping baby. “I don’t want them touching Sebastian without me right there.”
His lashes flickered, sweeping down to cover his expression and then up so he was meeting her eyes. “Is trust already going out the window?”
Remorse and guilt nearly crushed her, but she wasn’t going to lie. “I don’t trust them. I know you’ve known them a long time, but I haven’t. Please be patient with me, Kane.”
“Jaimie is family—a sister to me. She’d walk into hell for me—for us. I don’t know Eric well, but he’s always been the doctor to the GhostWalkers,” Kane said. “I don’t expect instant trust for the others on your part, Rose, but I do expect you to have an open mind when it comes to my family.”
She nodded, her fingers clutching the doorjamb until they turned white. She hated that she was disappointing him. “I’ll try.” It was the best she could do. For now, she couldn’t bear Sebastian to be put into the hands of strangers without her present.
She bit down hard on her lip, more agitated than she realized. It hurt to know that she might be letting him down, but she couldn’t bring herself to hand her child over to strangers, even with Kane looking on. He didn’t view them as threats, so it would be easy to kidnap the baby. He wasn’t watching for it.
Kane padded back across the floor, his bare feet making no sound. She watched him come, heart pounding, until he was looming over her. Up close, Kane was intimidating, yet his hands were gentle as he framed her face and bent to brush a kiss across her mouth. “Sebastian is too important to take risks with. If at any time you’re afraid for his safety,
I want you to rely on your instincts. I mean that, Rose. Never be upset because you’re protecting our child.”
She would have thrown her arms around him and hugged him close, but milk was still dripping, and she’d make a mess. “I’ll work on getting to know Jaimie,” she promised.
“I know you will.” The confidence in his voice steadied her. Maybe he really knew her better than she knew herself.
Kane reluctantly allowed his hands to slip from her face, instead of caressing her as he was inclined to do. Visitors could be a major pain, he was finding, when all he wanted to do was worship Rose’s body. And kiss her. He loved her mouth, that soft, shy, velvet paradise he could lose himself in for hours.
He bent over the baby’s bed. Jaimie had found a small crib, and the boy slept peacefully, unaware that his mother was upset over company. He touched the baby’s hand, aware that Rose watched him without moving, waiting to see if he would pick up Sebastian and take him into the other room. She was na**d beneath the robe, not the best garb to follow him out of the room, but she made no move, just held herself very still.