I had expected her to worry over looking fat or to be self-conscious, but she never did, and she never was. She would stand in front of the mirror and look at herself, then smile up at me like this was the best thing in the world. She was going to be a wonderful mother.

Then, one day, while I was putting together the baby’s crib in the master bedroom, I heard Harlow shout from the bathroom, “Grant! Hurry!” A million horrible thoughts ran through my mind, so I was expecting the worst when I found a smiling Harlow soaking in a bubble bath. I took a deep breath and told myself to calm the f**k down. I couldn’t believe something bad was about to happen every time she called for me.

“She’s moving,” Harlow whispered, as if talking might cause her to stop. “Come feel.”

I had been waiting for this. Harlow had felt her daily, but so far, I hadn’t been there at the right time. I knelt down beside the tub, and she took my hand and placed it on her stomach.

“Here, press down just a bit so she’ll push back,” she said softly.

I did as I was told, and sure enough, a gentle little kick was my response. The grin that broke across my face was so damn big it hurt my cheeks. I had a little fighter in there. She was strong like her momma.

“Isn’t that amazing?” Harlow asked as I held my hand against her stomach and felt Lila Kate moving around. I had obviously annoyed her, so now she was pretty active.

“She’s spunky,” I said, and Harlow threw back her head and laughed. Lila Kate kicked again and pushed against me. It was like she wanted to join us. Maybe she heard Harlow laughing and wanted out so she could be a part of this moment.

“Talk to her,” Harlow said.

I had seen Harlow talking to her stomach a lot lately. But I wasn’t sure I could do that. I had seen the ultrasound, and I could feel her. She was real to me, but talking to her seemed difficult. I was putting myself out there to love yet another person I could lose.

“I don’t know what to say,” I told her, hoping that she would drop it.

“Just tell her hello and that you love her. It doesn’t have to be profound. She recognizes your voice now. I’m sure of it. She’ll know you’re talking to her.”

Harlow had a lot of faith in this tiny little baby inside her. I agreed that she reacted to Harlow’s laughter, but I wasn’t sure she actually recognized my voice. It was probably no more than a muffled sound to her right now.

“Please, say something,” Harlow pleaded, and I knew I wasn’t going to get out of this. She wanted me to talk to our daughter, and I couldn’t tell her no.

I cleared my throat and bent closer to Harlow’s stomach. “How you doing in there?” I asked, then glanced up to see a very amused Harlow. “I imagine you’re ready to get out and stretch. Gotta be cramped in that little space you got.” Harlow was still watching me expectantly.

She wanted me to tell our baby I loved her. Saying that aloud would make it real. It would make the fact that I was once again vulnerable to another person real. How could I keep her safe, too? What if I had to do it alone? Closing my eyes, I pushed that thought away. I wouldn’t think about it. I refused to.

“I love you, Lila Kate. I can’t wait to hold you and watch you sleep in your mother’s arms. If you’re lucky, you’ll look just like her.” There, I’d said it. Exactly what I was thinking. Exactly how I felt. I had laid myself bare.

“I hope she looks like you,” Harlow said, cupping my face in her hands. “You’re the pretty one.”

I lowered my mouth to hers and whispered just before I captured her sweet lips, “No one will ever be more beautiful than you.”

Harlow lifted her sudsy, wet arm and wrapped it around my neck and deepened the kiss while I soaked in the silky warmth of her touch. She could make everything better with a kiss. Fear and worry vanished when she was close to me.

“Get in with me,” she said, and started tugging on my shirt. I didn’t argue. I removed my shirt, then got rid of my jeans and boxers, before climbing in behind her. She turned around to straddle me, her ever-larger br**sts covered in bubbles. This was quite possibly the best bath product ever invented. At least, for the male species. I filled my hands with her tits just as she sank down onto my hard length. When she had me completely buried inside her, she arched her back, causing those fantastic play toys to jiggle and sway.

“You’re in control, sweet girl. Take it how you want it,” I told her while enjoying the beautiful view.

She leaned back and put her hands on my legs. I couldn’t have asked for a better position. Then she took it a step further and began to bounce slowly up and down on me. I wanted my hands full of her boobs, but then they’d stop that hypnotic movement, so I grabbed her waist instead and helped her ride me.

“I could watch these titties all damn day,” I said as she moaned and slammed down on me harder.

Unable to withstand it any longer, I reached out and squeezed them, feeling the pebbled hardness of her ni**les against my palms. She cried out my name, and it made me even crazier.

“Ride it, sweet girl. Show me what makes you feel good. That hot little pu**y is my f**king nirvana. You know you’ve got me so wrapped up in you I can’t see anything or anyone else. Just you. Just you.”

“Oh, God, I’m gonna come. Keep talking naughty,” she panted as she reached up and covered my hands with hers.

“Soaking-wet pu**y is swollen and horny all the damn time. I want to slip my fingers in those tiny panties and play with it every time I look at you. Taste you and smell you. You smell so incredibly sweet.” My dirty talk sent her over the edge.

She grabbed my shoulders and began calling out to God and me all at the same time. “That’s it, come on my cock,” I encouraged her as she trembled and shuddered. “My sweet pu**y.”

“Oh, God! Stop! I can’t take it. I’m so close again,” she moaned, leaning into me. Then she clamped down on me, and I lost my restraint.

Grabbing her hair, I yelled out her name and followed her into ecstasy.

My sweet Lila Kate,

Your nursery is almost ready. It’s fit for a princess, but then, you are a princess. You’re our princess. There has never been another baby girl who is as loved as you are. I’m secretly hoping you look just like your daddy. But no matter who you look like, you will be beautiful.

We can’t wait to show you the things we’ve bought for you. We bought you your first Christmas ornament today. It’s white with pink polka dots and your initials monogrammed on the front. When I saw it in all of its sweet little girlie cuteness, I wanted to make sure you had it to hang on the tree every year. That way, if I’m watching from the clouds, you can remember that I picked it out for you. Daddy had the idea to get your initials painted on it. But then, he’s a smart man.

I hope that we hang it on the tree together each year. I’ll bake cookies, and you can decorate them with icing and sprinkles. Then we’ll string the popcorn and make a mess with glitter and glue as we decorate our own ornaments. It will be the most loved tree in Rosemary Beach. We’ll invite Nate over to help us. I’m sure he’ll enjoy making a mess as much as you will.

I’ve been stocking your library with all of my favorite picture books. I’ve written a note in each one from me to you, and I’ve added the dates that I bought the books, in case I’m not there to share them with you. Your daddy will read them to you. He can tell you about all the places I took him to in search of the perfect books for you.

The weeks are ticking by, and before I know it, I’ll see your face. If we have a lifetime or only a few moments together, you will be the most important thing that ever happens to me in this life.

Love you always,

Mommy

Harlow

We were attending a fund-raiser ball at the club tonight to raise money for the local fire department. Rosemary Beach wasn’t a big town, and the nearest big city was a forty-five-minute drive away, so the volunteer fire department was very cherished and necessary.

Woods had decided to host the ball, though the truth was, many residents had plenty of money to give to the fire department outright—and many did. That’s how it had gotten its start. But they liked to attend big galas so they could dress up and spend the evening with important people like Rush’s dad. Dean Finlay, the drummer for Slacker Demon and my father’s best friend, was on the board of directors for the Kerrington Country Club. He wasn’t your typical board member, but then, neither were Grant and Rush, and they were also board members. When Woods had inherited the club from his father after he died, he fired all of the other board members and chose his own. He and his father had never seen eye-to-eye on anything.

Senator Barnes would also be in attendance. I wasn’t sure of everyone who had made the invitation list, but I had heard his name from Woods recently. I hadn’t been spending much time at the club now that Nan was back in town. I was enjoying our house and preparing for Lila Kate. Dealing with the social dynamics of the Kerrington Club was something I wanted to keep my distance from right now. I spent time with Blaire at her house or mine; same with Della.

But tonight Grant had to fulfill his duties as a board member and needed to be there. Finding a dress that fit me was another story. My stomach was really showing now. I was thirty-one weeks along, and both Lila Kate and I were doing well. She was moving more and more lately; she’d started pushing her little foot so hard I could see my stomach stick out in that spot. Grant was highly entertained when this happened. Made it worth the discomfort to hear his laughter while he watched her beat me up. Honestly, I wouldn’t trade one of those moments. Ever.

With Blaire’s help, I had found a knee-length black crepe empire-waist gown with a crystal-encrusted halter neckline. I wore it with a pair of silver Louboutins. How was it that I had never felt beautiful before, but now that my stomach was the size of a basketball, I suddenly felt better about myself?

“Wow.” Grant’s voice interrupted my thoughts, and I glanced up in the mirror to see him walking up behind me. His eyes gleamed with appreciation. I let my eyes travel down his body, wrapped perfectly in a tuxedo. I had seen him in one before, and I knew how devastatingly handsome he could be, but this time, he was mine. And when the night was over, I would get to undress him. All mine.

“If I wasn’t a board member,” he said, before his lips touched my bare shoulder, “I would keep you here, and you could wear that sexy little dress, and we could play striptease. You strip, and I watch.” His wicked grin made me laugh.

“Sounds like I would be doing all the work,” I retorted.

He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “Trust me, baby, once you got naked, I’d make it totally worth it.”

I shrugged. “OK, fine. You talked me into it. Let’s stay here and play.”

Grant pulled me back against his chest and gazed at me in the mirror. We stood there together, the three of us. My obvious stomach—and Lila Kate’s presence—couldn’t be missed. I wanted a picture of us, and I wanted it now. Just like this. I could put it with the next letter I wrote to her.

“Where’s your phone?” I asked him, looking around for mine.

He reached into his pocket and pulled it out. “Here,” he replied.

“I want a picture of us. The three of us. Like we are right now,” I told him.

“OK,” he said, pulling me close to him, my back to his chest. “I think I can hold it up and point it down so it’ll catch your adorable bump.”

“It’s not a bump. It’s a beach ball. Just be honest,” I said.

He winked. “You never tell a woman that her stomach looks like a beach ball. The results can be dangerous. Now, look up at the phone. This may take a few tries.” He tried three times before he was able to get us both smiling and my stomach in clear view. I loved it.

“Text it to me. I want it, too,” I told him.

He nodded and quickly sent me the photo. I would look at it later when I found my phone.

“You know we can get someone to take better pictures of us tonight if you want,” he said.

I loved our selfie with Lila Kate, but that wasn’t a bad idea. I would ask Blaire to take some pictures of us tonight. Then I’d have several to put with the letters.

The Fireman’s Ball was a success. There were hundreds of people there, and each had paid a lot for a ticket. I foresaw new fire trucks in the near future for Rosemary Beach.

Grant kept me close to his side while he greeted people and made introductions. There were so many people I hadn’t met yet. Watching Grant like this made me even more proud of him. He could go from sexy playboy to businessman in the blink of an eye—although the only playing he was doing these days was with me.

“I’m going to find Dean. Rush is looking for him. There’re some influential people here tonight who Woods wants to become members of the club, and he thinks Dean might seal the deal. Will you be OK by yourself for a few minutes? I don’t see Blaire anywhere, but I see Della over there near the corner talking to Bethy and Jimmy.”

I preferred to visit with Della, Bethy, and Jimmy instead of people I didn’t know. Several strangers seemed to recognize me, and they all zeroed in on my stomach with wide eyes. I was sure this would somehow make it into the gossip magazines. I expected someone to Tweet a photo of me and share with the world that I was knocked up. I had managed to keep a low profile, but with this crowd, I wasn’t sure if that was possible.

“So you’re still pregnant. Like, you’re actually gonna go through with this.” Nan’s voice brought me to a stop, and I wasn’t sure if I should acknowledge her or keep walking. I wanted to keep the peace with her. I had no reason to be mad at her, and I knew she would forever hate me, but retaliating would only make me stoop to her level. So I faced her.