Obsidian Page 70
“You are mine.”
Alli was falling apart inside as emotions raged. Everything in her screamed to shut up and allow him to kiss her. It would be so easy to say yes and just sign the papers. She’d be at his side when he ventured out into Homeland. All the women like Kit could look and wish he were available but he’d be hers.
He might fall in love with me, her heart argued but her head knew how unfair it would be to lock him to her so early in their relationship. In a matter of days he was willing to make a lifelong commitment. So am I though, that little voice whispered.
Reason was a bitch and dates with other men played through her mind, a memory montage like This Is Your Life. She knew Obsidian was one in a million. She had slept with a couple of guys and had the life experience to be sure that he was who she wanted. All Obsidian had to compare her with were memories of a mate he claimed was forced to be his. No other woman had even kissed him.
Jealousy reared its ugly head when she just considered him putting his lips on someone else’s mouth. She pushed away unwanted thoughts of the other things he’d do with them, unable to stand the agony of picturing him in bed with a woman. He deserved a chance to know what his options were before he committed to a lifetime with the first woman he met after gaining his freedom.
“You’re mine,” he rasped.
And she wanted him to be hers. “I’m not saying no. We just need to slow things down.”
“You’re not leaving me.”
She didn’t want that either. “I’ll stay but no mate papers. You can ask me in six months.”
“That is a long time.”
It would feel like an eternity. “I want us both to be sure this is what will make you happy and it’s what you really want.”
“I know already.”
He looked so certain that her resistance began to melt. Don’t, she warned herself. Love him enough to do the right thing. Her fisted hold on the fine hairs of his neck loosened. “Humor me.”
“There is nothing amusing about you refusing to mate with me.”
“I mean, just give yourself some time so we’re both sure of this.”
“You are the one who is saying no.” He said the words gruffly, obviously a little angry.
“I want to say yes but I never want you to feel trapped by me or unhappy. It would break my heart to lose you that way.”
“Mates are forever.”
“That’s why I’m insisting we wait.”
“You belong to me, Alli.”
The sad way he said her name tore her apart. He honestly didn’t seem to understand the sacrifice she made by being strong enough to say no. “We’ll wait until you settle into the men’s dorm and meet more Species. Adjust to being free and the new world you’re in before you make that kind of serious decision.”
“They aren’t taking you away from me. We will move into the men’s dorm together.”
She no longer would have a home once the new doctor arrived, nor was she sure if she’d be allowed to stay on at Homeland if she wasn’t Obsidian’s official mate. “I need to use the phone to make some calls.”
“Why?”
She didn’t want him to freak out by mentioning it was possible that she’d be escorted off NSO land if they didn’t sign the papers. “I need to go over a few things with Justice or Fury. I have my stuff packed up but don’t know where it should go.” That wasn’t a lie but it wasn’t fully the truth either.
“It will go where you go, with me.”
Everything was black and white to him. It reinforced her belief that she was doing the right thing. Life wasn’t that simple. He’d learn that once the boundaries of his world were expanded.
“I’ll fix you lunch and make those calls while you eat.”
“You aren’t hungry?”
“No. I can’t eat as much as you do.”
He eased away from her and she released him, slipping off the edge of the island. “We’ll work on your cooking skills later. How about some sandwiches? I have chips too.”
Obsidian shadowed her as she prepared his early lunch. It was a good thing New Species provided groceries because it would cost a fortune to feed him in the outside world. Alli left him in the kitchen at the counter to go into her bedroom.
Her hands shook as she called the main office and asked to be transferred to Justice’s office. They put her right through to him.
“Allison? What can I do for you?”
“I’m really sorry about Obsidian’s behavior.”
“He’s newly freed. We expect aggression. You shouldn’t get between males in that situation. I could have handled him.”
She didn’t doubt that Justice North could fight but she didn’t want Obsidian to be hurt or worse, sent to Reservation. He wasn’t naturally antisocial but just hadn’t learned how to get along with others yet. “I wanted to talk to you about the mate papers.”
“They are being prepared and should arrive within the hour.”
She hesitated, debating her words carefully as she spoke softly, hoping her voice didn’t carry to the other room. “It’s too soon. He doesn’t understand that he has a lot more options than just being with me.”
“You don’t want to be his mate?”
“I do.” You have no idea how much. “I…love Obsidian but I’ve had months to spend with him and I’ve dated enough men to be sure what I want in one. All he ever had was a mate and now me.”