“I know. I’m helping myself. I want to learn.”

“About murder?” My dad glanced from me to Faythe, and I could practically hear his thoughts, even though they didn’t show in his expression. He was thinking that whatever had gone wrong with his niece—whatever had turned her into an insurrectionist, no matter how well-intended—was contagious. He’d probably round up all the uninfected tabbies in the morning to keep them safe from themselves.

“Not murder specifically. I want to learn about Pride structure and management.” Surely that was believable, considering my college major. “Dealing with the bad guys. Assisting my Alpha. Protecting the territory.”

My father sank onto the chair across from us. “But that’s enforcer business.”

“I’m an enforcer.”

“No,” Faythe said, in the gentle tone she usually saved for small children. “You’re a trainee.”

“Speaking of which...” Brian stepped into the living room from the hall, and a sudden jolt of nerves made my pulse race. I should have told him about my new job in person, instead of relying on the Lazy S grapevine. I owed him that much. “It’s time to get started.” Brian’s expression was blank and his voice sounded tense. “Jace asked me to take you on patrol.”

Of course he had. First, he’d told me to quit school, and now, he was pairing me with my fiancé. He was trying to show me all the things I’d have to give up to work for him, convinced that I hadn’t truly thought the whole thing through.

I understood the consequences of my decision, and while they were harsh, they didn’t matter. I’d done what had to be done, and really, wasn’t that kind of the pillar of an enforcer’s job?

I stood, and Faythe took my empty bowl.

Brian studied my face, but his was unreadable. “Change into something warmer and meet me out back.” Then he stomped off down the hall. A moment later, the back door slammed shut, and I flinched.

My father chuckled. “Lots of doors being slammed tonight.”

And each one felt like a potential life path being closed. I could only hope that somewhere, someone was opening a window.

“So, this is really what you want?” Brian held a bare branch out of the way for me, and even though I knew he was just being nice, probably out of habit, I almost wished he had let it smack me in the face. That was what I deserved, for blindsiding him with plans that would affect us both. But he was too nice a guy, which was what I’d liked about him from the beginning. Brian hadn’t changed.

I had.

“You’d truly rather be out here chasing bad guys and tearing up your clothes on thorns and branches than married to me?”

I ducked beneath a low-hanging limb and stepped over an exposed root. “It’s not an either-or situation. Faythe makes both work.”

“You’re not Faythe.”

“Ouch.” I’d reminded Jace of the same thing just hours before, but hearing it from Brian stung.

He took my arm as I stepped over a cluster of brambles. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“No, you’re right.” I pulled my arm free gently. “I’m not Faythe, and you’re not Marc.” But their arrangement only worked because they split the parenting workload just like they split the Alpha workload, and that was just as doable for Brian and me if he was willing to be an active parent.

But a big part of me was glad he hadn’t suggested it.

“Brian.” I put one hand on his jacket sleeve, and he turned to face me. Even if he hadn’t been standing in a beam of moonlight, I would have recognized the hope shining in his eyes. “Listen. This is just like college—a learning experience. Self-improvement. You’ve always known I want to be very involved in the running of my Pride.” I’d chosen a political science major with a minor in psychology for a reason: so I could learn from humanity’s successes and mistakes. “I just didn’t realize I want a physically active role until tonight. But I don’t know that this is what I want for the rest of my life. I only know I want to try it.” I shrugged, relieved to see that he relaxed further with every word I spoke, which meant that I was digging myself out of a hole for once. “And Jace wants me to quit, so when I’ve had enough, it’s not like he’ll try to keep me.”

“So, this is for us?” Brian’s eyes brightened. “For when we take over your dad’s territory?”

I blinked, surprised by his conclusion, though in retrospect, I could see how he’d come to it. I’d meant that this was for me—at best, a partial truth—but Brian could only conceive of us. “Sure.”

“Should I sign up for some classes? Maybe a leadership seminar?”

I almost laughed out loud. “I’m sure Faythe and Marc are teaching you everything you need to know.”

Brian nodded. “And your father will take over from there, after the wedding.”

The wedding. I’d been trying not to think about that for almost four years.

“We should really set a date.”

I shook my head, and too late, I realized I should have at least pretended to give that some thought. “There’s still plenty of time.”

His frown deepened, and he suddenly looked younger than twenty-six. “I thought you’d get more excited as you got closer to graduation, but you still don’t seem very interested in the wedding. Your mom and I are practically planning it ourselves.”

My brows rose. “You’re helping my mom plan the ceremony?”

“Someone has to.” He crossed his arms over his jacket. “But, Abby, I don’t know the difference between periwinkle and sky blue. You’d know that if you ever answered your phone.”

“I’m sorry.” I hadn’t been fair to him, and I had to fix that. Brian was exactly what I’d needed when I was eighteen, and it wasn’t his fault that I was no longer the girl I’d been when I’d agreed to marry him. That now I wanted more.

That when I closed my eyes, I saw a set of bright blue ones staring back at me.

I shook my head, trying to shake loose thoughts I had no business thinking. Brian would make a great father, and so what if he wasn’t stellar Alpha material? Times had changed. I could be the stellar Alpha.

“Okay.” I exhaled, mentally resigning myself to what I was about to say. “Send me whatever wedding stuff my mom gave you.” I held my index finger up to stop his smile before it got out of hand. “But consider yourself warned—I don’t know the difference between periwinkle and sky blue either.”