Inside Out Page 40
The drive to the pub wasn’t very long. Long enough for his car to smell of her, just lightly, almost as if he dreamed it up. By the time he parked the car near the pub, it had wended its way through him, exciting every part of him, body and mind.
“Did you get a new perfume?” Again with the blurting. She smiled at him, amusement in her eyes.
“No. Well, sort of. One of my new coworkers gave it to me. Her sister is some essential oils whiz. It’s got frangipani in it and something else, I can’t remember what just now. I thought it was lovely. Is it too much?”
“Not at all. I love the way it smells. Warm. Sexy. Provocative.” He smiled slowly. “Did you put it on all your pressure points?”
Her eyes went half-lidded. The long silence inflamed him and then made him nervous and the blurting thing seemed to need to return.
“I’m so glad I can finally say all the stuff I’ve been thinking. You’re so sexy, and it’s driven me nuts. I just, god, I just don’t want to scare you or freak you out. Will you just, you know, give me the sign if I push a button or go too far? I’m torn every time I’m with you.” Now that he’d said it, he hoped like hell she took it the way he thought she would. He had this need to tell her what she did to him. He wasn’t used to that. Wasn’t used to being unsure about a woman. Brody had laughed when he confessed this to the guys. Had laughed and laughed and then said, “Welcome to being in love.”
Cope was pretty sure that’s what it was. Love.
She turned to face him better. Even in the dim of the car, through the gap in her coat, he saw the shadow of her nipple on her right breast as it pressed against the sweater.
He licked his lips, imagining her nipple there, what she’d respond like. His c**k ached, hardening against the zip of his jeans.
“Torn how?”
“I’m caught between this intense desire I have for you and wanting to protect you and take it slow.”
“Oh.” She smiled, cocking her head. “Sometimes I don’t know what to say to you, Andrew.”
God, she undid him.
“I vote for honesty. I’m not going to judge you. I like all of you, Ella.”
She swallowed, licking her lips and driving him even more crazy. “That’s a very nice thing to say. I . . . God!” She hit her thigh with her fist, and he took it, unfurling her fingers and laying a kiss on the heart of her palm.
She gasped softly but didn’t take her hand away.
“You don’t have to say anything. I don’t want you to feel like you’re being tested.” He looked up at her. “It’s just me.”
“Okay, so don’t laugh. I don’t know if I’m doing this right! But since you voted, I will too. I vote, if it matters, for the former. Go with desire. I like the way you make me feel when you get up in my space and flirt. No, not flirt, you”—she licked her lips—“you turn your sex up so high it makes me sweat. But in a good way. No one has ever wanted me like that. It’s ridiculously awesome.”
He groaned, really wanting her to himself at that point. “Babe, you have no idea how much desire I’ve got pent up for you. I don’t want to scare you. I know it’s been a while, and you’ve only recently begun to have a more active social life and date.”
“Andrew, you don’t scare me. Not in that way.” She paused, cocking her head to look him directly in the eyes. “Never in that way. But . . . you disturb me. You’re big and bold, and I’ve just never truly imagined anyone like you saying this stuff to me.” She laughed, lightning quick, catching her bottom lip between her teeth a moment. “Okay, well, I may have imagined it, but I never thought it would happen in real life. I don’t know how to say this right, but I really dig that you want me. No one has ever regarded me with this”—she waved her hand at him—“level of sexual intensity before. It’s ...” She lowered her voice. “It’s the most thrilling thing I’ve ever felt. It’s dirty but only in, like, the best sort of way. I’ve never felt dirty like that before.”
Relieved and admittedly pleased, he leaned back, relaxing a bit. “Well, I can do dirty as long as you understand it’s the good kind.”
Her laugh seemed to surprise her as much as it did him. She clapped a hand over her mouth, but he took it, laughing as well. Looking down, her hands in his, her fingers entwined with his, something inside him burst and filled him in a totally different way. She may not have felt that wanted before, but neither had he. He wasn’t just Cope with her; he was Andrew.
What an odd moment; steeped with a lot of sexual energy, so much his c**k ached, his balls crawled close to his body and every inch of his skin was hypersensitive to her. At the same time, it was sweet, old-fashioned in some sense, and he believed it was about Ella’s spirit more than anything.
“I still want you to tell me if you’re bothered.” And he had to admit to himself, the idea that he could touch her more, talk to her more on a physical/sexual level greatly appealed to him.
“You’re my friend, and I trust you. That you’d even worry about any of my past issues making me feel scared by your incredibly flattering attention only underlines how amazing you are. I promise you I’m not afraid of you. I may have some button pushed at some point—goodness knows I have a few of them—but if that happens, it won’t be your fault, and wow, I sound so creepy.”