Reaching down with one hand I undo my pants and pull them slightly down my hips so the tip of my cock is showing. I move my hips into her and start swaying fast as the song picks up in beat. She’s leaning into me, moaning, until her eyes land on the tattoo on my side. She eyes it for a few seconds before speaking. “Onyx,” she whispers. “Holy shit!” She looks behind me and around for a few seconds before smiling and fingering for someone to come join us. “Look at this. One of the strippers has your name tattooed on him. That is crazy. I don’t know anyone else by that name.”

I turn beside me to see a woman with platinum blonde curls, tattoos, and piercing green eyes. The whole world crashes around me. It’s not just any woman. It’s her. It’s Onyx. My Onyx. Except . . . she’s different now. She’s even sexier than I remember and she looks as if she’s just seen a fucking ghost. I can’t breathe for a moment as I take her in, trying to decide if this is really happening. It’s been four years, four fucking years. She is the most beautiful woman, still, to this day.

Her eyes meet mine and her whole body stiffens, but she doesn’t speak. Her eyes just take me in as if trying to figure out how I look so different.

Well, damn! I am trying to figure out the same. When did she get all of those damn tattoos and color her hair? She looks wild and dangerous. I love it.

She’s stunning, hypnotic, and addicting . . . and I want her.

Four years I have wondered where she’s at and here she is right in my damn face.        

Chapter Three

Onyx

My heart has literally just stopped in my chest. Four years. I have gone four years avoiding the very man that is standing next to me with his dick practically hanging out of his pants. And of course, it’s for another woman. I guess some things never change.

Hemy. My Hemy?

No matter how hard I want to deny it, my traitorous heart gives me away. This man still makes my heart beat wild in my chest and steals my breath away with just one look into those amber eyes. This is going to be hard. Really hard.

It takes every bit of strength in me to pull my eyes away from his gaze. He’s looking at me as if he wants to wrap his hands in my hair and pull me into his arms. The pain in his eyes is so intense that it causes an ache in my chest. It’s the very look he gave me for the six years we had known each other. What started out as a friendship, turned into something passionate, wild and painful. Very painful. I really tried healing him. I did. But a person can only take so much before they lose control themselves.

I take a step back to compose myself before bringing my eyes down to Hemy’s side where sure enough, Onyx is tattooed in big black fancy letters. I feel my throat close up as tears sting my eyes. I won’t do this here. I won’t show my weakness. I’m different now. I’ve changed. I’m no longer that weak woman that just let everything slide. I’m much stronger now and no one will break me down again and let me lose myself. Not even . . . him.

“Onyx,” Jade squeaks. “Do you see this?” She runs her hand over Hemy’s skin causing instant jealousy that I quickly push away. I won’t let myself feel. I can’t.

I bring my eyes up to meet hers and put on my mask; my game face. “Yup. That is definitely my name. How strange is that?”

Hemy has finally come out of his frozen state and is now staring at me, looking me up and down. I look different. A lot different. But . . . I’m not the only one.

Holy hell!

He runs his hands through his long hair and takes a step away from Jade. His hair is much longer than I remember. It’s sexier, making me want to run my hands through it myself. “Onyx,” he says in a painful whisper. “What the fuck?” He goes to reach for my chin, but I move away too fast for him to even make contact. “You’re back and you couldn’t even tell me.”

I watch as he rubs his hands over his face in frustration. Of course I didn’t tell him. He ruined me. Paralyzed my heart and soul. I wanted to live with him but the truth was, I was doing anything but. I was far from living. I was surviving and he was barely even doing that.

“I’m not doing this, Hemy.” I turn to walk away but he grabs my arm to stop me. My heart skips a beat from his touch. “Let go,” I snap. “I don’t owe you anything. I told you I was leaving and I did. I had to. This is not the time or place.” I give him a quick once over, taking in his thick build, tattoos and piercings before yanking my arm from his reach and turning away. “Just do what you’re getting paid to do.”

Why the hell does he have to look so damn delicious? Even better than before. Not good. Not good at all.

“I’m sorry, Onyx. I had no idea.” Jade jumps down from the table and fixes her tiara. “I’ll grab another one of the guys. It’s not a big deal. You two umm . . . I’m going.”

I grab her arm right before she walks away. “No. You won’t. He is getting paid good money for tonight and he better damn well deliver. I’ll be upstairs if you need me.”

“Onyx, wait!”

I hold my hand out in front of me and start backing away. “Don’t! Just please let my girls enjoy the night. That is all I ask. What we had was in the past. It doesn’t matter now.” I bite my tongue and walk away as fast as my heels will allow me. I can’t let him talk. I can’t let myself fall back into him.

I take the stairs two at a time and rush into the bathroom without looking back. As soon as the door closes, my back is pressed against it and I’m falling to the ground with the door supporting me. My hands grip my necklace as I fight to catch my breath. The necklace that Hemy gave me eight years ago. The only piece of him I took with me.

I’m not ready for this yet. I thought it would be different seeing him again. I thought I would be over us. I’m not. I’m so far from it. The truth is, if I hadn’t run away when I did, then I would be wrapped up in his arms, clutching him instead of this damn necklace. I came back too soon.

Why do I do this to myself? Why am I still doing it?

Four years of not seeing his face or hearing his soothing voice has been damn near torture. Not a day went by that I didn’t wonder where he was or what he was doing. The other problem was, I had to wonder who he was doing. I couldn’t allow that to bring me down so I found other things to occupy my time. I can almost see why he did what he did. Almost.