Fate and Fury Page 6
“The doctor side in me is coming out, and I need to know how you are doing Jen.”
Jen smiled hesitantly. She was excited about her and Decebel’s baby, but it was also a source of pain. Jen sat and Cynthia sat across from her, legs folded in front of her, elbows leaned on her knees. She waited patiently for Jen to answer.
“I feel fine physically,” her hand instinctively went to her abdomen. “I haven’t even been sick, no pain, and no weird other female problems I’d rather not describe.”
Cynthia laughed. “As long as there isn’t anything weird, you don’t have to describe it. How do your moods seem to you?”
“At times I feel a little out of control, like I can’t decide if I’m okay or a mess, you know? Then other times I feel like everything is going to be fine. Dec will be back, he will fix this whole problem with the Fates, and we’ll have a healthy baby girl.” Jen looked down at the ground, absentmindedly tracing a design in the dirt. “Those are the thoughts I have to cling to.” She met Cynthia’s gaze and tried to smile, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “I’ll let you know if there’s a problem, okay?”
Cynthia returned the smile. “Okay, but when you start getting farther along, we will have to start doing physical exams.”
Jen shrugged. “I’m no stranger to taking off my clothes doc.”
Cynthia chuckled as she stood and headed off to her make shift bed. Jen looked down at the dirt where she had been tracing with her finger and her eyes filled with tears, as she saw she had drawn the markings that covered Decebel’s skin.
She turned away from the drawing to face Jacque and took her hand. Jen held it between her own, rubbing it, probably more for her comfort than for Jacque’s. She looked at her red headed friend and her heart ached to see her in such a helpless state. Jen stared, pushing her will at Jacque as if that would be enough to make her open her eyes. If Fane were here, he would be going crazy; but he wasn’t. None of their mates were, and for the first time she felt alone. She needed Decebel, no matter how much it bothered her to need him, she did. Jen needed his strength and his comfort. She needed his brooding presence so that she would have someone to be sarcastic with and she knew he would be able to take it. Jen needed to hear him tell her she would be okay and that their baby would be okay. She needed him to tell her when she needed to shut the hell up, because as her fear rose so did her sarcasm and irritability and she knew none of the others needed that nor deserved it.
“Damn you Desdemona for taking him from me,” she muttered, into the cold, dark night. Her eyes narrowed and she looked out into the forest, wishing that the witch would come walking out in all her evil glory. Jen never though she was capable of being cruel, but she decided then and there that she would peel the flesh from Desdemona’swrithing body while she still lived. Was she a little blood thirsty? Maybe, but then the witch had taken her mate, putting him in danger and causing him immeasurable suffering. For that alone, she had signed her death warrant, not to mention all the other atrocities she had already committed in her long, meaningless life.
“Jacque where are you?” Jen asked her friend. “I want you to know that I will take care of you, always Jac. And, I’m going to give you hell for lying there on your back while we do all the work.” Jen snorted out laughter to herself as she thought of the remark Jacque would give to that comment.
Her heart sank as she continued to watch the steady breathing of Jacque, but no other signs of life could be found. Jen wanted to run. She wanted to shed the human skin and let her wolf run free, howling at the pain that she felt for the loss of everything. Jen missed her parents and she smiled to herself, thinking it was a feeling she had never thought she would ever feel. But, when she stood to lose something that she never imagined loosing, she admitted that she didn’t want to lose them, no matter how tense their relationship had always been.
She continued to sit staring into the night, a lone sentry guarding her friends. Part of her was eager to go to sleep hoping to hear from her mate again, but another part of her dreaded hearing the desperation in his usually calm, secure voice. He needed her just as badly as she needed him and here she sat unable to do a damn thing for him. Jen growled in frustration and gradually all the ugliness of her reality set in and took root in her heart. She bowed her head and closed her eyes giving into the monster of defeat, if only for a little while, she would let herself be weak, let herself fall apart while there was no one to watch.
Chapter 3
“I pride myself on my ability to hate indiscriminately. Truly, I look at the world from a viewpoint of total equality when it comes to the depths of my abhorrence. If life were fair, I would be honored for my impartial treatment and lack of favoritism. But, life isn’t fair. Life is cruel and dysfunctional. It kicks you in the ass and then laughs as you crash into others, taking them down with you as you fall. And, that is why I love to be alive. It means I get to watch all of you suckers go down and rest assured, I will wish equal amounts of pain and disfigurement on each of you. If I’m lucky; I will get to be the cause.” ~Desdemona
“Tell me why I should believe that you are willing to betray your race? Why should I trust a Fae?” Mona glared at the cloaked figure that stood across from her.
“Perizada has been a thorn in my side for too many centuries. I am done standing in her shadow. I am done taking orders from a god that cares only for wolves and has no respect for my people. She expects us to jump up, rescue her weak children, and it is time for someone to do something about it.”