My mind spins as I try to find a way to not go to blows. “What did you want me to say? I couldn’t believe it was you. When we were told about the mission, I thought it couldn’t be you—you were dead. We had a part of your body as proof. So when we get to Afghanistan and I realize it is you . . . I’m not sure what the fuck you expected from me, man.” I walk around in circles because there’s still a part of me that’s processing the fact he’s standing here. My brother in arms, my friend who I would’ve traded places with to die instead, is here.

I hope he takes a swing at me. I’ll get a good one in for the dumb move he made screwing around on Natalie. But then I look at him. He’s been home a few days and looks a little better, but the bruises still cover the one side of his body. He’s been broken.

“I love her. I thought about her day in and day out.”

There’s two sides to me, and both are so screwed up I don’t know where to turn. One, he’s alive and he thought he’d come home to the life he left. Two, he doesn’t deserve her. I do. I’m the man he couldn’t be and she loves me. She came to me last night, and I made love to her while he slept. I’m not perfect, but God, if I wouldn’t do anything to make this situation different.

“Look, man, you’ve been through more than I’m sure you’ll ever admit. I get that. But let me be clear: if you’d come home from that mission and Natalie would’ve found out you’d been screwing some froghopper behind her back looking for the next SEAL to hop to, she’d have thrown your ass out.”

“If Natalie chooses because of whatever I did, then I’ll let her go. No matter how much it’ll kill me. But don’t pursue her. I’m asking you as my friend. Give her and I a chance to see if we can mend our family for Aarabelle’s sake.”

The responses roll around in my head. So many things I want to say, but out of respect for Lee and the fact that this man saved my life on more than one occasion, I simply nod. “You really don’t get it?”

“Get what?”

“This isn’t up to you. You don’t get to make demands or requests. I’m not walking away for you. But understand this: I love her. I love Aarabelle. And I’m going to be the man in the end that has them. I don’t think you realize how bad you screwed yourself. So, I’ll give her the time she needs, because I don’t think she knows what end is up. I love her enough not to push her . . . do you?”

“I know her.”

“Not anymore. She’s changed, Aaron. She went through hell and then got kicked when she was already at her lowest. I was there. I saw it, and I won’t let her go down that path again.”

This is the best I can do.

He steps forward. “Fair enough.” Aaron extends his hand. “Thank you for being there for them. I’m grateful.”

No, he’s not. He’s hateful that I got his girl. I grip his hand and we shake. I don’t respond because I’m not sure I can be civil at this point. The urge to tell him to take his request and shove it so far up his ass he sneezes it out is on the tip of my tongue—but I don’t. We have history, and ultimately, I can’t force Lee.

She’s who matters here. And Aarabelle.

I have to sacrifice a part of myself for her and pray in the end she’ll come to me. Even if it means my closest friend will be fucked in the end.

“Hey Sparkles, can I come in?” Mark asks apprehensively.

“I figured they’d send you in first.” I grin as I wave my hand to usher him in. “You’d be the one I’d be more likely to forgive.”

“It’s because we both like to glitter.” Mark flops in the chair and slaps his hands on the side.

“Must be that.”

You can sense the tension in the air, but Mark is probably the best at masking his discomfort. Coming in here today was difficult, but I needed a sense of normalcy. Aaron didn’t notice I’d been gone all night, or if he did, he never said a word.

After I left Liam’s house, I grabbed Aarabelle and cried myself to sleep. I didn’t mean to sleep with him. I honestly just wanted to see him. But once he touched me, it became impossible to stop and there wasn’t even a part of me that wanted to. The lines in the sand are becoming blurred.

Walking in the office was far more difficult than I could’ve expected. Knowing prying eyes and Aaron’s friends surround me makes me want to cower, but I’ve done enough of that. I work here now, and I needed a reprieve.

People’s lives are in my hands—at least that’s my excuse.

“What can I do for you?” I ask after a few moments of awkward silence.

Mark grows serious as he shifts forward with his elbows on his knees. “I’m worried about you. I know you may think you can’t talk to me, but you can.”

I believe that he cares for me. I trust that he has good intentions, but I also know if push came to shove, their whole “bros before ho’s” bullshit would be in full effect.

“I’m doing fine.” The last word trips me a little. I immediately think of Liam.

“How’s Aaron?”

I glance out the window and mull over my words. “Adjusting, I guess—we both are.”

Mark waits for me to look back at him before speaking. “I know this is hard on you more than anyone. You moved on, you found out about the affair, you were happy, and now he’s back. It can’t be easy. Hell, I can’t even pretend to know what you’re feeling. But he’s been through fucking hell. If you’re in pain, imagine what he must’ve gone through in the year he was being held. I’m not asking you to forgive him,” Mark pauses. “I’m just asking you to let us help.”

My eyes widen at his last request. “Help? How do you plan to help?”

Mark tilts forward. “Jackson and I are your friends, Lee. Aaron can stay with me for a while, you can take some time off, or whatever you need. But all he could talk about on the plane back was seeing you. He never mentioned the other girl.”

I huff, “Like you’d tell me anyway.” I wait for him to refute me, but he won’t.

The stories of infidelity run rampant in the teams, but we all ignore it. We look the other way, because no matter what, they’d never tell the wife who’s blissfully ignorant. So many of my friends found out, after their husbands returned, that while they were holding down their homes, their husbands were fucking everything that walked. Some even after they’d made love to them again. It’s the worst slap in the face, and I thought I’d been immune to it.

“No, I wouldn’t have told you . . . but I would’ve made sure you knew.”

“What the hell does that mean?” My hands come down on the desk with a smack, and Mark looks a little startled. Good. “I’m so tired of these riddles and rhymes. You all talk of honor, valor, and code, but you’re all hypocrites!” I stand and the chair flies out from under me.

“Lee,” he says hushed.

“No!” I yell and walk over to him. “You don’t ‘Lee’ me . . . I’m tired. You can all tell me that in all the time you spent with Aaron for that year, you never suspected it? You can honestly sit there and tell me you had no clue? I’m sure more times than you know he said he was with you. How does that make you feel?”