But her new favorite picture was at the very bottom. It was the only picture she had of them on their wedding day. Jameson bending her into a dip, kissing her deeply. One arm wrapped around her waist, his other hand cupping her jaw. He was wearing one of his expensive, custom made suits. She was wearing a tube dress she bought at Forever21 for twenty bucks. So like them. So perfect.

Everything is so perfect.

~News Flash~

Financier Jameson Kane Keeps Girlfriend in the Dark, Ruins In-Laws

Late last night, thirty-three year old financial mogul Jameson Kane married long-time girlfriend, twenty-eight year old Tatum O'Shea, in a secret beach side wedding in Hong Kong. Speculators have long wondered when – or even if – the nuptials would ever take place. No engagement was ever announced, and the wedding itself seemed to have been spur of the moment.

Mathias O'Shea, father of the bride, and his wife were also spotted in Hong Kong, having dinner with the couple, but it is assumed they weren't invited to the wedding. Shortly after their visit, O'Shea was forced out of his position on the board at J.P. Morgan, and shares in several of his companies began dropping. The O'Sheas are also being audited, and thus far the IRS has discovered several years worth of unpaid taxes and unclaimed income. As of yesterday, it is rumored that O'Shea is putting his family home on the market, to pay off some of their debts. It is unknown if the O'Sheas even know of their daughter's wedding.

Sources close to the event claim that it almost didn't happen, with Ms. O'Shea showing up to her own wedding an hour late. But the vows were exchanged, and there is officially a Mrs. Kane, something most people thought would never happen.

Women the world over are weeping as the man known affectionately as “Satan” is officially off the market.

Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Kane. And if you have a wedding stateside, please send an invitation our way.