“Why don’t you and Braden play a couple games of pool or something? I’ll take Wes home, and then come back and we can talk.” Noah’s voice was steady, even as always.

“I’m not drunk. I can drive myself. I don’t need you to come back for me.” But if he came back, it meant he wouldn’t be fucking Wes.

“I know you’re not drunk but I don’t think you need to be taking off either. Not like this.”

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Noah ran through the woods, sweat dripping in his eyes as he went. He ignored it. Ignored everything except his need to find Cooper.

“Coop!” He yelled, his voice echoing out. The look on his face when Pete had accused him of being a sissy, of letting his parents die. Noah had never seen that level of hatred in someone’s eyes before. Especially not Coop’s.

He hadn’t been able to stop his friend’s fist from slamming into Pete’s face. And now couldn’t find him as he’d run off alone.

“Coop! It’s just me. No one’s with me. Where are you?” His feet slammed against the ground, before he suddenly forced them to come to a stop. Cooper sat, his back against a tree, leaves all around him. A lighter in his hand.

Noah’s heart dropped, sunk down into the ground. “Coop?”

“He knew I let them die. He knew I’m a pussy. I shouldn’t have run.”

Slowly, Noah walked over to him. Slowly he lowered to the ground. “You’re the bravest person I know, Coop.” And he was. He had lived.

“I hate myself for what I did. I should have died with them.” Over and over he lit the lighter. Fear skittered down Noah’s spine. This wasn’t like his best friend.

“If you would have died, I wouldn’t have my best friend. I know it’s not the same. But… you help me deal with stuff. You make people laugh. Everyone loves you, Coop. This town wouldn’t be half as fun without you in it."

I wouldn’t love it without my best friend in it.

Cooper lit the lighter again. “I’ve thought about it, ya know. That maybe I was supposed to die with them. That maybe I should go the same way. With my family… But, then I think about all the fun we have, and I don’t have the guts to do it. That just makes me feel guilty because I shouldn’t put how much I like hanging out with my best friend over being with my family.” The flame burst to life again.

“Give me the lighter, Coop.” Noah could hardly speak over the blood rushing through his ears. Thirteen was too young to talk about dying.

When Cooper didn’t move, he said it again. “Give me the lighter.”

Still nothing, so Noah decided to take it. He put his hands on Cooper’s. Coop trembled. Noah almost let go but didn’t. He…liked the feel of Cooper’s hand in his.

Just cuz he’s my best friend.

“Gimme the lighter, Cooper.” Slowly, Noah started unwrapping Cooper’s fingers from the black lighter. Each one went a little easier than the other. Then Cooper’s hand was open, the lighter in Noah’s, but he didn’t move. Didn’t let go. “Don’t talk like that ever again. Your mama wanted you to live. Your dad would have too. I…I need my best friend.”

At that Cooper’s blue eyes locked on Noah’s. This time it was Noah who shivered, and he could have sworn it vibrated through Coop, too.

Coop stared, then jerked his hands away and started to cry.

“God damn you, Noah.” Cooper’s voice snapped Noah out of the memory, as they still stood by the table. The same memory, that he knew Cooper was probably remembering, too. Because this was the only time other than that day, he’d seen that pain; that much devastating hurt in Cooper’s eyes.

“Go. I’ll take Wes home.” Braden told them. He nodded at the man, then peered down at Wes, who did the same, telling him to go. They had to be wondering what was going on. Why Cooper was acting the way he was, and why they’d both stood there for so long.

“Thanks.”

Cooper pushed his way through the bar. Noah didn’t catch him until they were outside. “We’re taking my car,” he told Coop.

“I can fucking drive.”

Noah grabbed his arm and pulled him toward Noah’s Mustang. “I wasn’t asking. Get in the fucking car, Cooper.”

He was surprised when Cooper did as he said. Coop slammed the passenger door behind him, as Noah climbed into the driver side. Noah revved the engine, his tires squealing as he peeled out of the parking lot.

The inside of the car was silent, thick with tension. Neither of them said a word as Noah sped home. The second he pulled into the driveway, Cooper was out of the car, the window rattling when the door hit.