“Thanks,” I said, though I didn’t sound very convincing. Now that I was here and my bladder was thankfully empty, I thought miserably about how I had left.

The look on Flynn’s face when he walked back into the house.

Our argument.

The horrible feeling that things were changing.

“Let me give you the grand tour,” Nadine said, snapping me back to the present. She looped her arm with mine and tugged me toward the window on the far wall. “This is my window that overlooks the Deli and Grocery.” She turned me around to face her living space, which was, like the bathroom, ridiculously tiny. “This is the living room slash kitchen.”

“Where’s the kitchen?” I asked, looking around.

Nadine pulled me across the room and stopped in front of a tiny stove and mini fridge. A small length of counter top stretched along the wall. There was no separation between the kitchen and the rest of the room. Nadine had put a café style table and chairs in the corner to delineate the “eating” area.

“Check out the flat screen,” she enthused, pointing to the TV attached to the wall. I cocked my head to the side.

“Is it crooked?”

“Yeah, my neighbor Tommy hung it for me. I just figured guys would know how to do that stuff. I was wrong. But it’s bolted in there with heavy-duty screws so it’s not going anywhere without use of a jackhammer,” she huffed.

“I guess you can just watch TV with your head to the side,” I suggested, snickering.

“Shut up, Ells,” Nadine laughed and led me to the only other door in the place.

“And this is my room,” she said with a flourish. Her bedroom consisted of a twin-sized bed shoved under the window, a bookshelf made of plastic egg crates and a garment rack for her clothes.

“Wow, Nadine, it’s…uh…”

“Small. Cramped. The size of a fucking shoe?”

I chuckled. “I was going to say functional.”

“Yeah, well for $1500 a month, it should be.”

I almost swallowed on my tongue. “$1500 a month? For this?” I gasped, looking around, wondering if the faucets were plated in gold and I had missed it

“Ellie, babe, that’s cheap for New York. I was lucky to get this place. The other apartments in the building go for $1900 for a one bedroom. But they’re in a lot better condition.” She pointed to the cracked and peeling ceiling and the obvious mold in the corners.

“But who cares about the apartment! It’s the city that matters. This neighborhood is great! Over there at that bar, they have live music every weekend. The Pixies used to play there back in the day! The restaurant next door has the best Serbian food in New York. The vintage record store on the next block has Radiohead and Tom Waits bootlegs. There’s this clothing store on Gates Avenue that sells couture knockoffs that look so much like the real thing that the designers don’t even know they’re fake!” Nadine rambled until she lost her breath.

“Well, damn, who doesn’t want to eat great Serbian food and jam out to Tom Waits bootlegs?” I asked wryly.

Nadine smacked my arm. “You’ll see. Mock all you want, but this place is amazing,” she stated.

I sat down on the couch and Nadine joined me. I wanted to share her enthusiasm. I wanted to be excited to be here. Isn’t this what I claimed to need? A chance to see what else was out there?

So why couldn’t I think about anything but a heart I left in West Virginia? Damn, that sounded like a country song.

“So you want to tell me why you’re here? Not that I’m not thrilled to have you here, but it’s strange that you showed up without Flynn. Did he not want to come?”

I ran my hands down my face, exhaustion hitting me hard. “No, he planned to come. But then we got into a fight and I just needed to get away.”

Nadine looked concerned. “You got in a fight? What about?”

I shook my head and gave her a forced smile. “I really don’t want to talk about it. Why don’t I get cleaned up and you can show off this city you’re always bragging about.”

Nadine clearly didn’t like the change of subject but she agreed. “Okay, we can just wonder around here today. Tomorrow I’ll take you into Manhattan. Oh! There’s this great pub we can go to tonight. They serve authentic English pub food. Their fish and chips are amazing!”

“Sounds great. Do you mind if I get a shower? I need to rinse off the travel funk,” I asked, grabbing clothes out of my bag.

“Sure. Go ahead. I’ve got to tell you though, the hot water only lasts five minutes so you’ve got to make it quick,” Nadine warned.

“Five minutes. Got it.” I pulled out my cell phone to see there were no missed calls or texts. Not that I expected Flynn to do either. I needed to let him know I was here. Even though we were fighting, I knew that he’d be calculating the time on my trip, counting miles traveled and when I should have arrived.

I’m at Nadine’s. Made it here in one piece. It’s loud and kind of awesome.

I texted.

I stared down at my phone and finally his answering text came in.

Okay.

I tried not to be disappointed. Flynn didn’t do long texts. But this felt different. He was upset. I could feel it from here.

I love you. I texted back. No matter how messed up I was in the head right now, he still needed to know that. Because that was one thing that hadn’t changed, even if I felt I had.