Josiah’s erection was so hard it hurt. “Me, too. I want you, too.” He fell backward when Mateo pushed him down, his legs hanging off the bed.

“You look so different.” Mateo went down on his knees, running a hand over Josiah’s chest. “You’re bigger.”

Mateo’s simple touch almost drove Josiah over the edge. He felt it everywhere. Never wanted it to stop. “I...Damn it,” he added when Mateo pinched both of his nipples. “I work out now.”

“And your hair. I miss it lighter, but you’re still fucking gorgeous.”

He savored the feel of Mateo’s hands in his hair. “I shaved it...when I was mad at you. For years.” Maybe he shouldn’t have said that, but he wanted Teo to know.

“I deserve worse than that.”

Before Josiah could reply, Mateo’s mouth slid all the way down his erection, sucking him to the back of his throat. Josiah couldn’t stop his hips from thrusting forward. Oh, God. His whole body shuddered, pleasure ripping through it.

Teo ran his tongue from the base of Josiah’s shaft to the tip. “I missed this. Missed you so fucking much.” He ran his tongue down the seam of Josiah’s sac. Sucked one of his balls into this mouth, then the other. “Wanna taste you everywhere. Lie back.”

Heat took Josiah over, his cock achingly hard. He did as Mateo said. Then let Teo lift his feet so they were flat on the bed, his ass on the edge. His erection jumped, bounced against his stomach, when Mateo’s tongue flicked his hole. “Teo!” He pushed down, trying to get closer to Mateo’s face.

“Wanna love every part of you, mi precioso.”

The name made the past slam into him. Josiah fought his way through it, trying to stay in the present as Mateo alternated between sucking him and letting his tongue play with his ass.

When his mouth covered Josiah’s shaft again, he felt his orgasm pushing closer and closer to the surface. He didn’t want to come yet. Couldn’t, because he wanted every part of Mateo, too.

“I want to taste you, too.” He softly tugged at Mateo’s arm. Dark brown eyes met his from his spot kneeling between Josiah’s legs.

“Dios, I missed you.”

Josiah sat up, capturing Mateo’s mouth with his. He ignored the dizziness taking him over, wanting to think, feel, and know nothing but Mateo right now. Josiah pulled him to his feet, Teo going easily.

He hated that his hands shook slightly as he started to pull down Mateo’s sweats.

“I love this.” Teo touched his hand. “Love that you want me as much as I want you. I never stopped, Jay. I never stopped—”

“No.” He shook his head. “Not now.” He knew once they started talking, all the touching would end. There was so much time and pain between them. And Tristan. Tristan was still there, the thought making Josiah freeze up.

“I’m not giving you away. You go to him and then come back to me. You have to or everything will crumble around us.”

So Josiah kept stripping Mateo. Watched as his dark erection sprung free. Hunger exploded inside him.

Mateo moaned, threading a hand through Josiah’s hair when he sucked Teo into his mouth. He tasted salt—like masculine skin that Josiah loved so much.

“I’m not going to last very long if you keep doing that, Jay.”

Josiah slowly dragged his mouth to the tip of Mateo’s cock before letting his tongue circle the head. His heart ran wild. Having Mateo here like this, he could almost forget about all the pain. It was just love. Love and passion that had always been between them.

Mateo tilted his head up, much like Tristan had done with him not long ago. “I want you, Jay.”

And he wanted that, too. Wanted it so badly... But he also wanted Mateo. Wanted to make him his, as though that would change things. As though that would make it so Teo never could have sent him away and he’d never have to lose him again. As if he could have both Mateo and Tristan... “I’m still with him.” He wanted Mateo to know that. Teo frowned but nodded as if he understood what was going on even though he didn’t.

Josiah pushed to his feet, his body skin-to-skin with Mateo’s.

“Dios, you’re trembling.” He ran his hands down Josiah’s body. “Why are you shaking?”

“Because I want you, Teo. I want to be the one to make love to you.”

Mateo didn’t move. Didn’t reply, pinning Josiah with his stare. It wasn’t something he’d ever asked when they were together before, and it wasn’t something Tristan could give. It wasn’t even something Josiah would want all the time, but he did crave it.