“I’m here to apply for the job?” I said with a shaky voice.

He smiled as he handed me an application, and I filled it out. After I talked with the office coordinator, explained that I’ve been working steadily as a waitress for over two years, and told her how important exercise has become to me, she hired me on the spot. Sure, with the office’s minimum wage I won’t be making good money like I did at the Roadhouse, but I feel great that I have a way to make some cash and will hopefully learn something too.

I love the late afternoons after classes when the heat has died down. Vanessa, Kelsey, and I like to lie out on towels on the quad, just talking and studying. They giggle when guys whistle at us. And even though Kelsey and I haven’t talked about our past, everything seems okay. I love having friends again.

I keep wishing Jeremiah would walk by and challenge me to a game of Parcheesi or something. But he doesn’t.

Jeremiah and I only text each other twice during my first week, and we never make plans to meet up again. I texted to see if he wanted to run together one morning or evening and he replied: We don’t run the same speed. It makes no sense to train together.

I took a literal step back when I read that text. Fine, I thought. He’s right. I would just slow him down.

But honestly? I scared him off. He isn’t jumping to see me anymore. I find myself looking for him on campus, at the gym, at the bagel place, on the quad between classes. With 30,000 kids at this school, it seems impossible to just run into him. How is it possible that I miss him so much…but I’m scared of him at the same time?

Mom always said I depended on Kyle too much: a guy should fit into your life, Annie, not become it. I don’t want to depend on Jeremiah like that. I go to dinner with Kelsey, Vanessa, and Colton every night, and on Wednesday, I grab a coffee with Michael after he trained me for my new job.

But I still miss my friend.

Maybe that rush Jeremiah told me about applies to friends too. Maybe he lost that feeling of flying with me. Maybe that’s why he’s barely paid attention to me this week.

I mean, I asked him to give up something he loves just because it scares me. Me, somebody who has given him nothing except friendship. Am I being selfish? Yeah. But I don’t want him to get hurt.

On the Friday night before my first twenty-mile run—the farthest distance Kyle ever ran—instead of carbo-loading with Jeremiah, I find myself driving back to Franklin to the drive-in movie theater. Grease is playing tonight. Kyle and I loved watching this movie together. I loved the songs and he loved when Sandy wore the hot leather outfit and smoked a cigarette at the end.

God, I miss the way things used to be. I buy a small popcorn, sit on the hood of my car, and use my thumb to wipe away the tears.

Marathon Training Schedule~Brown’s Race Co.

Name Annie Winters

Saturday

Distance

Notes

April 20

3 miles

I’m really doing this! Finish time 34:00

April 27

5 miles

Stupid Running Backwords Boy!!

May 4

6 miles

Blister from HELL

May 11

5 miles

Ran downtown Nashville

May 18

7 miles

Tripped on rock. Fell on my butt

May 25

8 miles

Came in 5 min. quicker than usual!

June 1

10 miles

Let’s just pretend this day never happened…

June 8

9 miles

Evil suicide sprint things. Ran w/ Liza. Got sick.

June 15

7 miles

Skipped Saturday’s run…had to make it up Sunday.

June 22

8 miles

Stomach hurt again. Matt said eat granola instead of oatmeal.

June 29

9 miles

Matt says it’s time for new tennis shoes.

July 6

10 miles

Jere got hurt.

July 13

12 miles

Finished in 2:14! Only had to use bathroom once

July 20

13 miles

Halfway there!

July 27

15 miles

Humidity just about finished me off. Time 3:06.

August 3

14 miles

Hurt knee. Overdosed on Pepto.

August 10

11 miles

Wore new knee brace—it messes with my gait.

August 17

16 miles

Didn’t get enough sleep in dorms.

August 24

20 miles

Need lifetime supply of Pepto & ice packs. Stat!

August 31

14 miles

September 7

22 miles

September 14

20 miles

September 21

The Bluegrass Half Marathon

September 28