Awake at Dawn Page 44

He shifted and lifted his hand around her shoulder and pulled her a tad closer. "You're welcome."

Neither of them said anything for several minutes. She just sat there, close and absorbing the feel of him beside her. Questions tumbled around her head like a pair of tennis shoes in the dryer. But embarrassment kept her from voicing them.

"Go ahead and ask it," he said, almost as though he was reading her thoughts.

She raised her head off his shoulder. "Ask what?"

"Whatever it is that's making you feel embarrassed and curious. I can read your emotions, remember?"

She frowned. "And I hate that, too. I don't want you reading me."

"But I can't help it. I don't know how to not read you." He chuckled and looked down at her. And just like all the other times they were together, the night had a fairy-tale feel about it. The stars twinkled like diamonds in the sky. The trees looked too full. The moon, less than a week from being full, gave off enough light that she could see his face. "I think you're going to have a bruise." She touched the side of his nose. He caught her hand in his and kissed the inside of her hand. "So, what is it that's making you embarrassed and curious?"

"I'm just..." If she didn't tell him now, he'd probably envision the worst. Then again, what she was curious about might be the worst. "Just ask me." He nudged her with his shoulder.

She hesitated and then just blurted it out. "I'm curious about how many girls you've been with. I know you're almost eighteen and..." Her words faltered. Kylie knew he wasn't a virgin, and not just because he'd said something that led her to believe it, but just how ... he kissed. His brow crinkled and she could tell he wished he hadn't pushed her to ask.

"Oh," he said.

"Oh?" she repeated. And now more than ever she wanted an answer.

"You made me ask, now you have to answer."

He hesitated. "A few."

"That's vague." She pulled her fingers from his.

He breathed in and then out. "Okay, four."

"That's more than a few."

"Sorry." He didn't deny that he'd been lying. "It just feels awkward talking about it with you."

"Yeah, it does," she said, realizing she didn't like knowing. Didn't like thinking about him being with someone else. "Sorry I asked."

"Don't be." He leaned back against the cabin wall and went back to listening to the night. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure." A nervous flutter tickled her stomach. But considering how personal her own question had been, she couldn't tell him no.

"If Lucas were still here, would you still be sitting next to me?"

Chapter Fifteen

His question ran across all sorts of nerves and not the good ones, either.

"What kind of question is that?"

"Obviously a hard one." He pulled his knee up to his chest and stared down at his toes.

Something told her he was reading her right now-trying to understand her emotions. But how could he when she didn't understand them herself? "He's not here," Kylie said.

He looked over at her. "Rumor has it that he's coming back."

She felt her breath catch in her throat. "Doesn't matter," she forced herself to say. "He's with Fredericka."

"He'd drop her for you like this." Derek snapped his fingers. "He's not blind or stupid."

She shook her head. "Well, maybe I don't want anyone who'd run off with someone else."

He arched an eyebrow. "It's the 'maybe' in your answer that worries me more than the confusion you're feeling right now." He leaned his forehead down to hers. "Please don't break my heart, Kylie."

Her own heart almost broke right then. "It's the last thing I want to do."

He kissed her softly, then pulled back. "I should get you back to your cabin before everyone gets back here."

She nodded and accepted his hand to help pull her up. They started to walk off the porch when he stopped. "Oh, I forgot. I got something to give you." He ran back inside and returned after a few short seconds holding a piece of paper.

"What's this?" she asked when he put it in her hands. "It's a telephone number of a private investigator."

When he didn't continue, she asked, "And I need it for...?"

"You said you were trying to find your real grandparents. This guy is good at finding people. If anyone can find them, he can."

Kylie looked up from the paper. "Do you really think he could find them after all this time? I mean, I've been trying to just find Daniel's adoptive parents, but I can't even find them."

"He's that good," Derek said.

Her heart started to sink. "And probably that expensive. I can't afford him." She started to give him back the paper.

He caught her hand. "He's not charging you, Kylie. Call him." "Why wouldn't he charge me? You said he was a PI."

"Because he's a friend of mine. And I used to do some work for him on the side."

"You worked for a PI?"

"Yeah. I went to him to see if ... if he could help me locate my dad." That piece of news also surprised her. She didn't think Derek wanted anything to do with his dad. "Did he find him?"

"Yeah," Derek said. "You missed a great pizza tonight," he added, making it clear he didn't really want to talk about his dad.

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